how to recognise a true friend?

'Friends are forever!” Mystic Friends is a unique friendship portal that would enlighten us with the ideals and notions of true and spiritual friendship and the value of friends in our life.

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ConfusedMind
Posts: 650
Joined: Thu May 14, 2009 11:55 am

Post by ConfusedMind » Thu Jul 22, 2010 12:43 pm

i also want to be a friend. if it does need sacrifice and adjustments in a friendship, i find its very easy. but, beware. i'm very quarrelsome and argumentative.
I'm weird

Elgina
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Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 11:57 am

Post by Elgina » Fri Jul 23, 2010 12:13 pm

No two person is ever similar....

Friendship is all about compatibility...

If you like somebody's company nature and characteristics become secondary...

Quarrels and arguments are part and parcel..Friendship only requires persistence and trust....

ConfusedMind
Posts: 650
Joined: Thu May 14, 2009 11:55 am

Post by ConfusedMind » Fri Jul 23, 2010 12:47 pm

I trust everyone by default. I ask everybody to do so. see, what is the worst fate you can meet? just that you would be betrayed. nothing more than that. being betrayed is a better option than exercising the brain feel dubious.
I'm weird

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FairyQueen
Posts: 214
Joined: Sat May 22, 2010 5:30 am

Remark

Post by FairyQueen » Fri Jul 23, 2010 1:54 pm

Mahatma Gandhi said it is better to be fooled then not to trust anyone. Good it suits I supose.

FaceValue
Posts: 79
Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2010 3:49 pm
Location: Grand Forks, ND

Post by FaceValue » Sat Jul 24, 2010 12:05 am

I would like to trust people. In some ways I do, but whenever there's a chance for them to trust me, even with something as mundane as driving someone back from the hospital after a surgery, I get that 'oh he's so creepy! I can tell he's thinking all kinda of dirty thoughts.' look from people. I really don't get it, though. I never talk about anything creepy, or use crude humor. I just have that aura which people don't like. I find it extremely annoying, and it gets in the way of making friends.

As far as HAVING friends goes-I don't really like them. My outlook has always been this: At some point, I'm going to separate from this person, and after a few months of odd calls we will realize that there's no reason to carry on communicating. At least at my age, my life and that of a friend I would have goes through scenery changes very often. I've never had a hard time just severing a friendship without a single feeling of regret. You may say that this is a negative outlook, though I look at it differently. Perhaps morbidly, though it's a way I can accept the way life is. Eventually, we will be separated and never see each other again. It would be better to not have to miss this person for years and years than simply forget about them.

The topic at hand though is 'True Friends'. I believe there is such a thing, though the topic is opinion-based and not fact-based, so it may be interpreted in as many ways as one may wish it to be. I had a 'true friend' once. Not oh so long ago, actually. It may strike some of you to find that the difference between a 'true friend' and someone you love is very similar. For me it was so similar that I didn't even know I loved this person until we hadn't seen each other for a month. There's a long story spanning 2.5 years now of this whole situation, but this I have learned thoroughly. If you have someone who is a 'true friend' of yours, or that you truly and deeply love, distance and time will not matter in your feelings towards them. As things turned out, it was impossible for us to talk to each other, and yet we both knew each other as best of friends. Had things remained the way they had between us a year ago, it would have remained that way the rest of our lives.
I may have this a little off in terms of what one would define a friend, but I've spent far too much time pondering this situation to have doubts as to the lessons there are to learn from it.

Thank you for reading.
You can't save the world, but maybe you can save the one person who means the world to you.

Elgina
Posts: 195
Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 11:57 am

Post by Elgina » Sat Jul 24, 2010 1:08 pm

Everything starts with me and ends with me... It is the thinking of this world....But, to put oneself into other person's shoe is the most difficult task...

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FairyQueen
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reply back

Post by FairyQueen » Wed Jul 28, 2010 5:05 am

Good, I fully agree to you but what will u do if you are sensitive but your friend acts insensitively with you?

FaceValue
Posts: 79
Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2010 3:49 pm
Location: Grand Forks, ND

Post by FaceValue » Thu Jul 29, 2010 11:25 pm

Talk to them about it, and try to get them to see from your viewpoint. First and foremost though-you must step back yourself and look at the situation in all the different angles you can. A different viewpoint isn't the wrong one.
You can't save the world, but maybe you can save the one person who means the world to you.

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FairyQueen
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Joined: Sat May 22, 2010 5:30 am

reply back

Post by FairyQueen » Fri Jul 30, 2010 8:35 am

Thanks for your suggestion first but want to tell you some more. Suppose you like your friend when she talks rubbish and you can indulge in the incessant blabbering as well. but when friend becomes colleague and you have to confront the same situation in office .can you handle it? Personally you might like the person a lot but  professionally you  find the person irritating and incapable what will you do at that time?

ConfusedMind
Posts: 650
Joined: Thu May 14, 2009 11:55 am

Post by ConfusedMind » Fri Jul 30, 2010 10:26 am

i may sound spiritual or theoretical. but i believe that sense or sensitivity has vibes. if you behave sensitively, your friend is sure to behave sensitively with you, no matter how insensitive he/she really may be. likewise a very sensitive friend may also behave like a blunthead if he/she has to deal with something that is not very sensitive.

the same applied for professionalism also. if your chattering friend sees you working seriously, would he/she be able to disturb you? you may be afraid that you may appear harsh and hurt your friend. no, it's not like that. and, even if it is, let me tell you that medicines often taste bad.  

oh gosh! I've given another lecture!! never mind.
I'm weird

FaceValue
Posts: 79
Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2010 3:49 pm
Location: Grand Forks, ND

Post by FaceValue » Fri Jul 30, 2010 10:37 am

There are many ways to read what you're trying to say, FQ. If you're saying that you ask silly around your friend because that's how you two spend your time best, then it's nothing to be concerned about, and your friend should know when it's time to buckle down and act serious. If your friend doesn't actually act, and she is that way, then you need to talk on a one-on-one basis as carefully as you can, being sensitive to her feelings.
If you mean you act like a completely different person around her, then you need to ask yourself why you have to be someone else in order for this person to like you?
^^^
The above is my opinion only, and does not in any way reflect professional wisdom or proven points.
You can't save the world, but maybe you can save the one person who means the world to you.

Elgina
Posts: 195
Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 11:57 am

Post by Elgina » Tue Aug 03, 2010 8:06 am

I think the term friendship is more natural. It is all about level headed approach, fluency of the wave length, empathy and comfortableness between the two persons. Why to think too much about other issues ?? I appreciate others' comment but this is my sole opinion.

ConfusedMind
Posts: 650
Joined: Thu May 14, 2009 11:55 am

Post by ConfusedMind » Tue Aug 03, 2010 11:20 am

isn't it a circle? we started with this and came to the same place again. its very simple to recognize a friend. ain't it?
I'm weird

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FairyQueen
Posts: 214
Joined: Sat May 22, 2010 5:30 am

mystic friend

Post by FairyQueen » Tue Aug 03, 2010 12:04 pm

Think less and feel more in friendship. Lets enjoy the togetherness and keep aside all the logic on this auspicious occasion of friendship day.

ConfusedMind
Posts: 650
Joined: Thu May 14, 2009 11:55 am

Post by ConfusedMind » Wed Aug 04, 2010 9:24 am

yes fairy, you are right. and we know the results of paralysis of analysis.
I'm weird

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