How to clear personal biases before a reading?

[Cyprine]

Hi again!  I just wanted to hear some stories from other people on any rules, guidelines or exercises they use/do to avoid all those personal biases that might cloud a reading.  

I know that often times when I turn to the tarot, it is when I am in dire need of some guidance, some light of hope.  However, my state of mind is usually quite confused at such times and it really muddles my interpretation.  Either I can't make any sense of the spread or I can only see the negative aspects of it.  Perhaps these are times when you should be read by someone else but I've always believed that you know yourself best (unless your best friend also happens to be a tarot reader).

I mean, a stranger reading for you may be highly intuitive, but unless they are actually psychic (like eerie, they know everything about everyone psychic) or know key details of your life story, they can only extrapolate so much from the cards.  Most people even in desperate times still have enough of a sense of privacy to not want to divulge every dirty little secret to a complete stranger.   With all this said, the best reading should come from yourself and yet you are always your own worst enemy.  

The other case applies to when you are reading for someone else (a friend or a stranger, especially one you meet face to face).  We are only human and we can hardly claim to be absolutely objective.  Personal opinions and biases WILL crop up at some point.  

So I ask this of everyone, what do you do to avoid these pitfalls?  How do you beat down those elements interferring with a reading?

[George]

Hi again!  I just wanted to hear some stories from other people on any rules, guidelines or exercises they use/do to avoid all those personal biases that might cloud a reading.  

I know that often times when I turn to the tarot, it is when I am in dire need of some guidance, some light of hope.  However, my state of mind is usually quite confused at such times and it really muddles my interpretation.  Either I can't make any sense of the spread or I can only see the negative aspects of it.  Perhaps these are times when you should be read by someone else but I've always believed that you know yourself best (unless your best friend also happens to be a tarot reader).

I mean, a stranger reading for you may be highly intuitive, but unless they are actually psychic (like eerie, they know everything about everyone psychic) or know key details of your life story, they can only extrapolate so much from the cards.  Most people even in desperate times still have enough of a sense of privacy to not want to divulge every dirty little secret to a complete stranger.   With all this said, the best reading should come from yourself and yet you are always your own worst enemy.  

The other case applies to when you are reading for someone else (a friend or a stranger, especially one you meet face to face).  We are only human and we can hardly claim to be absolutely objective.  Personal opinions and biases WILL crop up at some point.  

So I ask this of everyone, what do you do to avoid these pitfalls?  How do you beat down those elements interferring with a reading?

overall the best tool in overcoming those pitfalls is to get to know and talk to many people as possible!   listen to new people even if you disagree and ask more question and don't argue the answer they give.  always start with a positive but i don't understand what do you mean type of replies.  it seems to have worked for me but yet as you said we are all human and i still have some issues especially if someone reminds me of someone that hurt me or insulted me, etc.

as for Tarot readings and not letting them know every dirty secret.   i would say it not all that important what so every to say anything that you do not want known.   if you asking question that don't involve those secrets they wont really see that!  
there is a point to trusting the person you are asking questions to for a reading or what not.  sometimes you have to let go and trust to get that reading you may want but are afraid to ask.  overall do what makes you comfortable.  

as for reading for yourself that theory is disputed by meaning with a list of con and pros to it.  when i read for myself i find it to be completely accurate and hard to listen to to where i want to read different means to it all gets a little muddled and i lose track although at times it has helps me a lot when i didn't get in those states.   i've only been read, here on this board,  and found them have give more of a bias reading on things going and a little more easier for me to follow what they said.  i think it has its good and bad aspects to it.  

ttyl  :smt006

[chrisdee]

Hi Cyprine
before i start to read i clear my mind and do some deep breathing, until the everyday hustle and bustle stops, When i first started reading the cards i read only for myself which even in troubled times were completely accurate, i just didn't see it at the time. i now accept what I'm been told and have no problem. i knew the traditional meanings but sometimes different meanings started coming to me, so after doing Gems course i started psychic Tarot reading, i had the opportunity to practice on a perfect stranger the other day, that was more than satisfied, with her reading. when i read i look for no more than the answer to the questions they ask i do not even try to delve deeper
personal biases do not come into it just an open mind that doesn't pass judgment after a reading any information is completely forgotten about

[pirbid]

Hello, Cyprine!

Interesting subject you have brought up. Many non readers ask how and if the readings work, and if they work better from a complete stranger or from one's own mother  :smt003 (I would not try this one myself).

My own personal belief is that, just as in dream interpretation, we always work with the querent's inner guide. Through the card images, we try to bring to their conscious mind what they already know in their unconscious. You just tell him/her the story you see unfold in the cards before you, as if you were recounting a film or storybook. Her/his unconscious will do the rest by pointing out the relevant issues in the querent's life, no matter if they decide to share those revelations with the reader or keep absolutely mute during the whole proceeding in order not give any clues away  :smt018

Shame, really, because those who do give some feedback are likely to go on to explore further those bits that are still unclear through an expanded reading on the spot or a more specific spread. Of course, the reader can hardly offer those to someone who does not express a need for them.

As for reading for oneself, I find the readings I do for myself are very accurate and much more brutally honest than when read by others. It does not mean other readers are less accurate, but we usually try to be nice, positive and polite to those not ourselves. What I know is that I never bother beating around the bush when reading for myself, so I feel like the cards are giving ME a good beating  :smt013

However, I never found myself biased even when reading for people I know. I do not make up card interpretations to fit what I know about them. In fact, I am sometimes puzzled by the cards that come up till they tell me they do feel their situation is well described, but that does not stop me from reading them, even if it is in a questioning tone.

Nice to see everybody join in the discussion  :smt002

[Sunsetcoquette]

Meditation works wonders for me, even just for a minute. We so often forget to simply breathe. Once I can be calm and objective, I shuffle and choose my spread.

[farafina]

Hi there,

I have found that Tarot reading for oneself can be quite therapeutic in times of confusion. Actually, I use it to meditate and to exercise self-control over my own wants and desires. There are things which I would like to hear and see, such as "I'll get this promotion" or "I will have money coming", but my tarot ards are STRAIGHT  with me. Before reading, I have some quiet time , not long, like 5 minutes, and tell myself that I am about to engage in a conversation with my guides and that I should accept to hear the truth...
So when I read the cards, Iopen my heart to what they say just as if I were having a ocnversation with my guides: because in the end, that is exactly what a reading is.

Maybe you can try doing what I do and let us know if it works for you...

[seadrenea]

I find that clearing biases or forcing out any already defined characteristics about my self or others I read on several occasions, hurts the readings or causes confusion. For one person in particular, I encourage her to concentrate on more specific issues because a general reading keeps turning up the same cards. For my self, well we are all our own best friend. It is too easy to see a card in a positive light, when in fact it signifies a sarcastic outlook to the situation.
It would be my suggestion to not clear away any certainties perceived or otherwise but to try to incorporate what you already know into what is being revealed now!

[Payewacker]

Hi Cyprine,

I used to not trust readings I do for myself, but lately, has been proved wrong. So yes I do readings for myself and hubby, as George said, sometimes so difficult to follow the advice, it's like pulling teeth from a horse.

When I have a upsetting time, whichever way, i don't read at all for even up to two weeks later. Be sure the Leo blood, fire and all. Very emotional and therefore it takes a bit longer to settle my spirit.

Blessed be

[Lycona]

Interesting topic.  And one that I'm sure has come up for just about anybody who has read for themselves or others.

For me, it depends upon my mood and the mood of the cards.  Some readings are crystal clear and others I end up just shuffling up and saving it for a better day.

I guess what I look for in a good reading is that certain "something", or a feeling that I've picked the right cards.  Then, the first meaning or impression that comes to me when I look at the card is what I should look at, regardless of the cards written meaning.  If I see a person in a card, the first person I think of when I see that picture is the person the card is talking about.  Sometimes, it might be a facet of myself, an archetype, or someone I know.  I guess that is why it is so important to find a deck that you really connect with and use it a lot.  I have a lot of decks (I counted 15 this afternoon), but only one or two do I use regularly.  

I tend to read for others better than I do myself, regardless of how well I know the person.  I think I actually read for complete strangers better than I do friends or family, since I guess personal biases are removed.  I've been told I do a pretty good job, so I must be doing something right.

[Lycona]

Payewacker,

Where do you get your name?  I guess by your picture that you are a leo.

My cat's name is Pyewacket, which is an old Renaissance name of a cat familiar.  Your nickname is just pretty close to that, so I was curious.