IS HONESTY THE BEST POLICY?

Samson · Post by **Samson** » Wed Nov 22, 2006 9:01 am

That is very well said Rhuto, I couldn't say it better myself.

Vishwas · Post by **Vishwas** » Wed Nov 22, 2006 10:39 am

Fantastic rutho, u read my mind, I couldn't have put it as good as u have.

So rainy, yes, we would lie if we don't mean to cause them any harm, intentionally or unintentionally. If u want to lie to the person to harm him then it is wrong.

rainy · Post by **rainy** » Wed Nov 22, 2006 11:54 am

i'm finding it hard 2 accept that lyin is acceptable. I understand ur points n logic tells me its right but i have a real issue with lyin. Its hurts me so much 2 no that the ones i love lie 2 me, looking into my eyes as they do it.

batnitchka · Post by **batnitchka** » Wed Nov 22, 2006 12:05 pm

edited for privacy

spiritalk · Post by **spiritalk** » Wed Nov 22, 2006 2:42 pm

Sometimes creativity is necessary to not hurt someone in truth.  When asked how someone looks...they want a 'good' no matter what the question.   In all situations we can be gentle, kind, but honest.

Vishwas · Post by **Vishwas** » Wed Nov 22, 2006 7:19 pm

Very good points by batnitchka & spiritalk.

I have been hurt by lies too, & it took me the better part of 5 years (or 16 years) to forgive them, so take ur time to forgive them. If u feel they are hurting u intentionally, then think if they deserve to be in ur life or not, & then decide it. & do what u would want to do.

Samson · Post by **Samson** » Thu Nov 23, 2006 9:14 am

I have been lied to as well, but the difference with me is I don't go holding grudges for years to come, because that's not me.

rainy · Post by **rainy** » Thu Nov 23, 2006 12:48 pm

Thankyou all 4 sharing ur thoughts.
I'v had 4 relationships with men The first was a complusive liar, a cheat & abusive n left me in hospital with a 2 month old baby who lung had collasped 2b with a woman old enough 2b his mother who he'd bin havin an affair with while I was pregnant n in hospital for the last 5 months of my pregnancy as I lost one of the twins I was carryin at 4 months due 2 a beating he gave me.
The 2nd relationship lasted 11yrs n was asbsolutely n completely honest 2 the point if I asked him if my bum looked big in this He wud say it did if it did (nicely) n i completely respected his honesty. I had 3 children with this man. The first died from SIDS n the other 2 r now 12 + 13 nearly.
The 3rd relationship lasted 3+ yrs n after I'd completely fell in love with him I found out he'd lied from the very beginning about nethin n everything n he simply couldnt help himself He had issues which were quite serious n ultimately destroyed wot we had .
My current relationship of 3 yrs on my birthday on sunday pretty much mirrors exactly the problems of the previous except to say that my previous relationships put 2gether were just a training ground 4 the problems I'v had with john. I thought he was the one n part of me stil thinks hes the one except this isnt wot I'v always dreamed about, for the greater part its my worst nightmare. I do know that fate has played a huge role in our relationship, which worries me because i'm obviously not getting the lesson that life is tryin 2 make me learn.
The problem with lyin to the one u love is that trust is completly destroyed n without trust u have nothin, dont u agree?
rainy x

Rhutobello · Post by **Rhutobello** » Thu Nov 23, 2006 1:07 pm

Yes....releationship have to build on mutal respect and honesty.

All other will be like building a house on sand,,when the rain comes...the house will be destroyed.

I feel with you Rainy....you have got your share of bad things in life....try to consentrate on the happy moments...and be sure that such behaviour aren't common for the male part of humans.

rainy · Post by **rainy** » Thu Nov 23, 2006 2:29 pm

thanku 4 ur personal messages 2 me Spent all day in bed yest Wish i cud say i slept but didnt. Was textin with john til 4am. He leaves n stays wiv his mother 5 minutes away from ere. Shes a cow n has hated me b4 she ever met me which she hasnt but i cook her meals twice a week as shes 76 n all she wants is 4 john 2 leave me n look after her. Its true. My Honesty is the best polict poicy poll is a gud example here bcoz the first arguement me n john had 6 months into our relationship was bcoz i could never believe that a little old lady wud lie to me, I prefered to believe that john as a proven liar, was lyin. NO it seems that john has learnt his behaviour from his parents.
rainy x

Vishwas · Post by **Vishwas** » Thu Nov 23, 2006 6:30 pm

If u see this rainy, "Friendship, Love, Honesty, Loyalty, Important above all." (which is also my sig in the site), this is my personal motto, Without these 4, there is nothing else for which I want to live. If u can't have all these 4 in a relationship, then the relationship is npot worth having. Certianly there are exceptions, but a (romantic) realtionship between 2 ppl (irrespective of gender) must have all 4 of these to survive.

peacetruthnlove · Post by **peacetruthnlove** » Fri Nov 24, 2006 12:13 am

I try to be honest with everyone I meet.  It definitely helps with all my relationships in the long run.

pranay · Post by **pranay** » Fri Nov 24, 2006 11:36 am

But bieng honest all teh time is very difficult. Sometimes not saying the truth is the wisest thing.

Vishwas · Post by **Vishwas** » Fri Nov 24, 2006 2:21 pm

To each his own, this is a debate which will never end, becuase Honesty is the Best Policy, but there are excpetions at times (like in everything else).

Samson · Post by **Samson** » Sat Nov 25, 2006 4:58 am

So true Vishwas, so true.

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IS HONESTY THE BEST POLICY?

IS HONESTY THE BEST POLICY?

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