"How do we forgive those who betray us?"
Moderators: eye_of_tiger, shalimar123
"How do we forgive those who betray us?"
"How do we forgive those who betray us?"
I have mixed feelings about this. Let me give you an example.
On an Artist Exchange site, some of the people are not so honest. I think that is very unfortunate, being that, as Artists, we really do need to band together and support each other. It's very hard out there, for Artists, no matter how talented you are.
Most recently, a Producer on the site, did something very mean, hurtful, and unprofessional to the young ladies of my dance group. He flew up to PA, bragged out how he discover "Usher", and many other famous people. I was skeptical, because of how he came off..but you should have seen the stars in these young, hardworking, and dedicated ladies eyes. He made all sorts of promises, video taped us..even asked me to choreography for he's new recording artist that he is currently managing. He took our work, my choreography, and was very in inappropriate with my girls in a personal matter, and he is married with two children. After I confronted him, he started ignoring my calls. I knew at that moment, that he was never going to call me back. As a Professional courtesy, he could at least have given us a copy of the video footage he filmed of us. He can do anything he wants to it, and I've have had choreography, dancers, and many opportunities stolen from me in the past.
My faith keeps me going, as to, my talent and ability to lead others, and still show compassion. But it's getting very hard for me, and I now have a strong "distrust" of people, in almost all walks of life (not all of this is Art related..)
I have mixed feelings about this. Let me give you an example.
On an Artist Exchange site, some of the people are not so honest. I think that is very unfortunate, being that, as Artists, we really do need to band together and support each other. It's very hard out there, for Artists, no matter how talented you are.
Most recently, a Producer on the site, did something very mean, hurtful, and unprofessional to the young ladies of my dance group. He flew up to PA, bragged out how he discover "Usher", and many other famous people. I was skeptical, because of how he came off..but you should have seen the stars in these young, hardworking, and dedicated ladies eyes. He made all sorts of promises, video taped us..even asked me to choreography for he's new recording artist that he is currently managing. He took our work, my choreography, and was very in inappropriate with my girls in a personal matter, and he is married with two children. After I confronted him, he started ignoring my calls. I knew at that moment, that he was never going to call me back. As a Professional courtesy, he could at least have given us a copy of the video footage he filmed of us. He can do anything he wants to it, and I've have had choreography, dancers, and many opportunities stolen from me in the past.
My faith keeps me going, as to, my talent and ability to lead others, and still show compassion. But it's getting very hard for me, and I now have a strong "distrust" of people, in almost all walks of life (not all of this is Art related..)
- Prof. Akers
- Posts: 1163
- Joined: Fri Mar 30, 2007 10:30 am
- Location: U.K.
Hello Middionne, I understand why you have trouble by forgiving with what's going on around you and how unjust it is to you, but only true forgiveness will set you free because if you don't it will eat at you for the rest of your life and surly that wont help you, only you will know when it is the right time to forgive these people to allow you to go on your way.
Samson.
Samson.
- AMANUSH-FORCE
- Posts: 403
- Joined: Fri Jun 24, 2005 4:09 pm
Revenge is the feeling which keeps us entangled and unfulfilled in the bodies for many births altogether.if you don't get rid of it,it will get rid you and destroy your will to that extent which can't even imagine ....
after the revenge cycle will not be over and goes till hundreds of human births just for the sake of bloody revenge entagled in body with no other feelings except REVENGE.
so revenge ,forget it man!!!!
after the revenge cycle will not be over and goes till hundreds of human births just for the sake of bloody revenge entagled in body with no other feelings except REVENGE.
so revenge ,forget it man!!!!
"How do we forgive those who betray us?"
"How do we forgive those who betray us?"
The answer to that question is often, "Reluctantly".
Prof. Akers above quoted the old saying, "Revenge is a dish best eaten cold!"
The meaning of that saying is, wait until you have cooled off before seeking revenge or you're likely to do something you might regret, also, no matter how sweet the smell of revenge might be in the heat of anger, when it is cold, the reality might not be so palatable.
The point of the matter, when talking about revenge is that nurturing hurts and wrongs and inflicting revenge only serves to poison you.
The beauty of forgiveness is that one can overcome within oneself, the negativity, and fill that poisoned space with overwhelming love.
This is the magic of alchemy, to turn that which is base into that which is pure gold.
That is why.
The answer to how do we forgive those whom we find almost impossible to forgive, I have found to be as follows.
You must practise imagining that person up on a stage in front of you and you must practice mentally pouring love at that person.
If you can make time to continue to practise this every hour, you will be amazed at the transformation which takes place empowering you, and also enlightening you as to how to relate more positively with others yourself.
The answer to that question is often, "Reluctantly".
Prof. Akers above quoted the old saying, "Revenge is a dish best eaten cold!"
The meaning of that saying is, wait until you have cooled off before seeking revenge or you're likely to do something you might regret, also, no matter how sweet the smell of revenge might be in the heat of anger, when it is cold, the reality might not be so palatable.
The point of the matter, when talking about revenge is that nurturing hurts and wrongs and inflicting revenge only serves to poison you.
The beauty of forgiveness is that one can overcome within oneself, the negativity, and fill that poisoned space with overwhelming love.
This is the magic of alchemy, to turn that which is base into that which is pure gold.
That is why.
The answer to how do we forgive those whom we find almost impossible to forgive, I have found to be as follows.
You must practise imagining that person up on a stage in front of you and you must practice mentally pouring love at that person.
If you can make time to continue to practise this every hour, you will be amazed at the transformation which takes place empowering you, and also enlightening you as to how to relate more positively with others yourself.
I know how difficult it is.. I too find it pretty hard to forgive...But I guess thats the best option... you know in ur heart u meant well.. we wud never wish bad for others. but he will understand someday that what he did isnt right. so i guess u shd forget and move on. and be careful in the future.
I have a friend who is at the opposite side of the spectrum...she was betrayed a lot in life and for reasons she consoled herself with...she has now decided to mis-trust EVERYONE that she meets...is always suspicious of her friends and believes they willl eventually betray her. Infact her first words to me were, "I don't trust you or anyone and you'll have to earn my trust...oh, but don't take it personally..."
Bit hard NOT to take it personal if you ask me...
However, the point is...being wary and mistrustful of people is no way to live...if you knew her and had a friend like mine, you would understand. She is constantly weighing up everything everyone says and does and wonders at every mannerism and because of her prejudice, mis-interprets many things that people do...
It's very sad to watch and what these people don't realise is that they eventually create their reality to JUSTIFY their (questionable) beliefs...and once you start down that road of suspicion, it's so easy to believe the worst of people...when always, I've always looked for the "best" in people.
I've been betrayed many times myself...the hardest to forgive was my father...but I'll tell you now, forgiving him was the best thing I could have ever done...for both myself AND him. The bitterness I kept inside was festering to monstrous pro-portions but in the end you realise...keeping that hatred inside just isn't worth it.
It is a much stronger person to forgive the sins of others and thus, lead by a shining example because remember, "You always teach what you need to learn". Be the brave one and others will be inspired by your lessons.
Hope this helps :)
Bit hard NOT to take it personal if you ask me...
However, the point is...being wary and mistrustful of people is no way to live...if you knew her and had a friend like mine, you would understand. She is constantly weighing up everything everyone says and does and wonders at every mannerism and because of her prejudice, mis-interprets many things that people do...
It's very sad to watch and what these people don't realise is that they eventually create their reality to JUSTIFY their (questionable) beliefs...and once you start down that road of suspicion, it's so easy to believe the worst of people...when always, I've always looked for the "best" in people.
I've been betrayed many times myself...the hardest to forgive was my father...but I'll tell you now, forgiving him was the best thing I could have ever done...for both myself AND him. The bitterness I kept inside was festering to monstrous pro-portions but in the end you realise...keeping that hatred inside just isn't worth it.
It is a much stronger person to forgive the sins of others and thus, lead by a shining example because remember, "You always teach what you need to learn". Be the brave one and others will be inspired by your lessons.
Hope this helps :)
I have been hurt a lot of times too and I'm very guarded . I don't trust that easily but I've decided to give people a chance . It becomes so annoying to be always on the defense and to be overly suspicious of people . So I've decided to let it go . I wish to believe that there also are good people also out there . If someone has negative thoughts regarding me , then that's their problem . I'm trying to be more detached and it helps a lot .
Detach and empower
I detach myself also. But at some time you realize loose threads still attached. So you have to empower yourself by saying "I am above all the pettiness involved. This minor intrusion in my life is not worth wasting my precious energy. I am better than this situation. There is no forgiving, just exemption and comfort in putting it behind you.
I find myself being open to everyone - until betrayed. Perhaps it is just a recipe for hurt? The fact is - love is all we have - exercising in a material world can be difficult. Closing ourselves off with walls - merely keeps us locked up too.
Is there a secret to forgiving? I wish I knew it! During recent events of stalking against me I am having a hard time keeping my cool and dismissing all the events. When someone claims your life and its accomplishments as their own it is hard to ignore - but how pathetic!
Is there a secret to forgiving? I wish I knew it! During recent events of stalking against me I am having a hard time keeping my cool and dismissing all the events. When someone claims your life and its accomplishments as their own it is hard to ignore - but how pathetic!
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 7 guests