The Best Divorce Ever

Pravin Kumar · Post by **Pravin Kumar** » Sat Nov 15, 2014 6:12 am

THE BEST DIVORCE EVER

The Best Divorce Ever

WOMAN ADMITS TO SLEEPING WITH HUSBAND'S BROTHER. HIS REPLY IS THE BEST THING EVER.

DEAR HUSBAND,

I am writing your this letter to tell you that I am leaving you for good. I have been a good woman for seven years. and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. You boss called to tell me that you had quit your job and that was the last straw.

Last week, when you came you didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your favourite meal and even wore a brand new negligee. You came home and ate in two minutes, s and went straight to sleep.the meals after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or any. Either you are cheating or you don't love me, whatever the case is, I am gone.

If you are trying to find me, don't. Your brother and I are moving away to West Virginia together.

Have a Great Life. Ex-Wife.

Dear Ex-Wife,

Nothing has made my life more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for 7 years. although a good woman is a far cry from what you have been. I watched sports so much to try to drown out your .constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice that you had cut off your hair last week, The first thing that came to my mind was, "You just look like a man." My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice.

When you cooked my favourite meal, you must got me confused with MY BROTHER. I stopped eating port seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had that new negligee, because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was just a coincidence that my brother had borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning, and the price tag on the negligee was Dollar 49.99.

After all of this I still loved and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit a lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought two tickets to Jamaica.

But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess.

I hope you have a fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with the letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this Carl, my brother was born Carla. I hope that is not a problem.

Just read this piece in FACEBOOK.

pravin kumar

Post by **eye_of_tiger** » Sun Nov 16, 2014 10:55 pm

Even if none of this was true, I have not had such a good laugh for a long time as I did after reading it.

Sounds like a severe case of the seven year itch.

Thank you for posting this.

Could you please include the original author's name, if it is known?

Thanks again,

EoT

Rohiniranjan · Post by **Rohiniranjan** » Mon Nov 17, 2014 9:39 pm

Not sure if this is appropriate or not but as if by serendipity, I got the following in my mailbox (not one of my serious and sincere divination-related ones!). Original author unknown!

Husband and wife were sitting one evening oh around 29th of December planning for the new years celebration. A phone-call came for the husband. After a while he returned and with an ashen look on his face he told his wife that his boss wants him to go to an urgent business matter related travel and then a fishing trip to make up for the overtime work during holidays. Husband told that not going would be career-limiting. Wife was a quite surprised but knowing how 'down' hubby had been lately and worried for his career (mid-life crisis!) so she dutifully and compassionately relented. This seemed to perk up hubby quite a bit and so he asked her to pack a few things for him and especially his new blue silk pyjamas!

He returned on 2nd of January, looking a bit travel-worn, tired but rather elated and relaxed. "How was the fishing, dear?", the wife asked. "Oh simply fantastic! We found so many fish!!" and he went on blah, blah, blah. Then he asked her, "But why did you not pack my blue silk pyjamas, love?"

The wife replied, "Honey, I did! They were in your fishing box with the baits and hooks and other fishing stuff!!"

I have no idea what happened (occurred next). Hopefully, Saturn had passed over pluto by then but in the absence of birthdata etc., of the wife or husband or the pyjamas, I would not have any clue! :-(

love, light and LEVITY!

Post by **eye_of_tiger** » Mon Nov 17, 2014 11:42 pm

I have no idea what happened (occurred next)

[Tongue in cheek response from me, recognizing the humour and irony of his delicate situation].

I believe that the husband is in imminent danger of having his "wedding tackle" surgically removed by his wife, who is no fool and who suspected right from the start when he received that phone call from his lady friend, that he is having an extra marital affair with this other woman that does not involve him wearing pajamas, or opening his fishing box.

Gotcha!

ROTFLOL

:smt005 :smt005 :smt005 :smt005 :smt005

EoT :smt066

Rohiniranjan · Post by **Rohiniranjan** » Tue Nov 18, 2014 1:41 am

Rohiniranjan · Post by **Rohiniranjan** » Tue Nov 18, 2014 1:41 am

eye_of_tiger wrote:
I have no idea what happened (occurred next)
[Tongue in cheek response from me, recognizing the humour and irony of his delicate situation].

I believe that the husband is in imminent danger of having his "wedding tackle" surgically removed by his wife, who is no fool and who suspected right from the start when he received that phone call from his lady friend, that he is having an extra marital affair with this other woman that does not involve him wearing pajamas, or opening his fishing box.

Gotcha!

ROTFLOL :smt005 :smt005 :smt005 :smt005 :smt005

EoT :smt066

Oh EoT, my soul-brother! Et tu...?

But, seriously friends and siblings of soul on MB (what else could I ever call you as...?) -- all those fishy tales aside, I came upon a most beautiful series of movies on netflix recently! The ones in hindi etc., I shall not touch upon for many do not speak that tongue here!

But there is this one titled, "SAMSARA" which is in no spoken language but uses the fundamental languages of sight and sound! A movie created in great taste and with great finesse of HD acuity and a veritable artform of great artistic magnitude!

Rather unique and soul-warming! And goes in deep, if you can open yourself to its presence! And, once there, it hopefully shall stay with you...!

Love and Light,

Rohiniranjan

Rohiniranjan · Post by **Rohiniranjan** » Tue Nov 18, 2014 1:42 am

Post by **eye_of_tiger** » Tue Nov 18, 2014 11:36 pm

For our Australian members, the DVD of the movie "Samsara" can now be purchased from ABC Shop Online.

But in order to be able to see it in all its full high definition glory, it can also be bought in Blu-Ray format, from several online retail outlets.

Bliss!

EoT  

Rohiniranjan · Post by **Rohiniranjan** » Wed Nov 19, 2014 2:25 pm

eye_of_tiger wrote:For our Australian members, the DVD of the movie "Samsara" can now be purchased from ABC Shop Online.

But in order to be able to see it in all its full high definition glory, it can also be bought in Blu-Ray format, from several online retail outlets.

Bliss!

EoT

YES! It is a work of art indeed, worth watching over and over again. Very tastefully done and the background music is very soothing and moving indeed!

Rohiniranjan

(Disclaimer: RR is not commercially associated with Samsara or its makers, distributors, sellers, etc.!)

jainnipun · Post by **jainnipun** » Wed Jan 28, 2015 9:29 am

Rather unique and soul-warming! And goes in deep, if you can open yourself to its presence! And, once there, it hopefully shall stay with you...!

Rohiniranjan · Post by **Rohiniranjan** » Wed Jan 28, 2015 11:34 am

jainnipun wrote:Rather unique and soul-warming! And goes in deep, if you can open yourself to its presence! And, once there, it hopefully shall stay with you...!

Is there an echo here?

RR

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