last nights dream

[nicolettedrew]

i cannot remember the events leading up to this part of my dream. i am in an unfamiliar house and have two little girls running around. my sister was there and had left to go catch the school bus at the top of the street. (my sis is 19 in real life) i am chasing the girls around the house tring to get them ready for the bus. (one of them is my daughter in real life who is 2, i am not sure who the other girl was, don't remember seeing her face) i looked at the clock and it was 8:?? am. the phone rang and it was my sister telling me to hurry up and get the girls up there before the bus comes. i chase my 2 year old out the door with a jacket trying to put it on her..........all the sudden it is a cat that i am trying to wrestle this jacket on and the cat turns around and bites my hand, after shaking the cat off i hit it with the jacket out of anger. (seems like my cat but everthing is a little fuzzy) there are a couple people there now, laughing at what happened. (not sure who the people are) (at that moment i woke up to my cell getting a text message from my cell provider at 8:32 am.)

does anyone have any insights as to what this dream could mean? thanks in advance.

[sweetsunray]

Cats can be a symbol of independence... This dream may reflect your feelings regarding your 2 year old daughter taking her first steps towards her independence. Of course she's still dependent of you, but 2 is a typical age where children start to try out things on their own, ignore advice or warnings to see and experience for themselves. They start to tell you what they want (clothes to wear, what to eat, what to do)... The cat fighting scene while putting a jacket seems exactly a typical scene between a 2 year old rebelling against her mom's efforts to keep her safe and well. And I think you're having difficulties with accepting the start of the process, realizing it's the first of many steps where she starts to grow up and become eventually an independent person (at least not for another 16 years yet).

I also think it's quite possible that the second child is actually you... a child version of yourself represents your innocence, that it is together with your own daughter, may suggest that until now you had innocent expectations of your daughter being a mini-you (and like all moms you discover she's not and has a will of her own).

My ex-bf's mom once told us how she originally saw him as an empty vat that she could fill with her own desires in personality when he was still a baby, and how soon she discovered he had his own personality already in there by the time he was 2. Indeed, "identity" (the center around which pesonality builds) is something we are born with. It is the one thing that can never change or will be changed. And your daughter has come to an age where she can express it more.  

The people laughing at the scene imo indicates you kinda feel embarrassed by it. Of course, intellectually you knew she was her own person, but it hadn't sunk in until this new stage where your daughter can run and talk and speak her own mind. And while it shocks and angers you even, at the same time you might think you've been a bit silly for it.

All the best with you and your daughter!

[nicolettedrew]

thats definantly something to think about! thanks for your insight!

[Rook]

I agree with what SweetSunRay says, but would like to also pick up on the school bus at the top of the hill.

Your sister is there and waiting for the bus.  I think she is in the dream because from experience you are probably both embarking on a strong learning experience.  Her probably still adapting to the changes from school to college and / or out into the professional 'real' world.  You are also going through a powerful learning experience, with your daughter?  Is she your only / eldest child?

You are about the same age I was when I had my first child, who is about to turn three, and a massive learning experience it has been for me.  A lot of people told me I was not ready for fatherhood, in fact I was told by people how sad for me they were that I had ruined my life.  But to be honest I don't think you are ever 'ready' for parenthood.  It is a learning experience.  You can't be a perfect parent.  Just a damn good one.  Like me ;)

So I see you as probably being like me.  Could the other child be your 'child-parent' as you are learning with your daughter on this fantabulous rewarding ride?

The dream seems to be all about rushing to get the child ready tofor the big world they are growing into.  Is she resisting this somehow?  Something related to her independence like the cat?  On top of that I know from my 2yo going on 3, you sort of wait on them hand and foot, thing is, the cat is sort of in charge.  It hangs about gets petted and loved, gets fed, and doesn't really do much for you (asides from the reward).  Could this be saying something about the way you feel the relationship is with you and your daughter?  The terrible twos are all about, as SSR says, rebelling and pushing the boundaries.  Its important for the children to learn that the parent is the authority, not the other way around (like the cat).  ie child/cat-master, parent-servant relationship is the bad path.  This would be prevalent if you ever watch supernanny, or tiny house of tearaways.  If you don't it is good watching for parents I think.  Both to put your childs behaivour in perspective and to learn a lot of the pitfalls.

But then that might not make any sense at all haha!

Best of luck with it all, and enjoy,
Rook

[sweetsunray]

A coat in dreams symbolizes putting on protection... and parents wants to protect their children, and children want to strike their own path... this battle literally starts with thick winter coats and mittens and scarfs and something on the head... the warmer parents can pack their toddler the better. And what does the toddler hate? It rebels against this protection.

As for cat masters, Rook... true you're not supposed to be the slave of either a toddler or a cat, but being the 'boss' of a cat is not the same as being the 'boss' of a dog... no cat will be bossed around, and ultimately they will do as they please. Even if they like to sit in your lap, they will choose the moment, not the other way around. And most likely, if you wish to force or impose on them to sit in your lap because you want that, the least likely you'll succeed in keeping them in your lap. In a way it's similar with children. Yes, you must teach them what cannot be tolerated, is unsafe, but you cannot force them to sit in your lap and be silent when you want to. Cats and children will keep a will of their own.  :-)

[Rook]

Wow, I read through my post.  I think it was the end of the day and I was tired or something.

I think you summed up what I was trying to say really well SSR.  I certainly wasn't trying to imply a strict regiment of discipline to keep the kids in line.  I was trying to say around that age it seems to me kids really push the boundaries, and it is important for them to do so, and it is just as important for the parents to let them know what those boundaries are in a firm but caring manner.

Such as peeing in the mop bucket every time it gets filled up.  Sure it is hilarious, but it is still a boundary and you have to force a straight face so they don't get the idea you find it as funny as it actually is.  I don't know that is exactly what I was trying to say... I think it is about being a firm, but warm and loving parent.  But not backing down when they turn on the water works to pull at your heart strings, but they should be having a cup of juice before they go to bed!  Or else they will be on an energy rush at bed time...  Such a bad scenario!  And saying no to your children can be such a difficult and painful thing to do.  Part of the reason why I take my son running in the pram.  He pushes me hard and I don't want to disappoint.  "Faster daddy!  Faster!"

Does that illustrate what I am trying to say?  I don't know...  I am tired again lol

[sweetsunray]

Oh yes, I totally understand what you're saying on the raising part when they're 2. Though I have no children of my own yet, I have a few memories left of that age (yeah I know it's rare). My first memory was of my 2nd birthday and has nothing to do with this subject, but I have 2 more, and twice it involved my mom telling me not to do something (as a warning) and I can even remember how it felt for me when she did that... I didn't even contemplate of doing something but just because she mentioned it is felt like my brain went bright red and all I could think was doing exactly that which she had told me not to do. It was something I simply could not resist. Just the idea became like an obsession that I had to do. And so I ended up doing it, twice, and got punished over it. She warned me not to draw on the first page of a storybook, and told me not to unwrap and open the birthday gift for my cousin. The strange thing was that the thought hadn't even crossed my mind to do either of those things, until she warned me off beforehand (probably because I had done it before I reached that age).

My mom used to tell me bedtime stories she made up about two brothers called Pim and Pom, and in those stories their mom would go to a shop or do something else and warn Pim and Pom not to go to the attic and try the wedding clothes in a trunk, or something else. She in fact of course just gave them ideas of what naughty things they could do and they would end up doing it, but wreck the clothes, or have some accident and would be found out. I think that it was partly my mom's joke on herself after she realized that sometimes she had simply provoked my 2 year old brain wired to try out exactly that which is forbidden.

Because of those memories I suspect that a 2 year olds brain is indeed wired to do the opposite of what they are forbidden to do... and in that way learn that they will be found out, that there are consequences and such a warning is given to prevent the consequences of ever happening. It seems a phase where children have to learn how their ego and wants may be in social confict with their surroundings (if not physical conflict, aka dangerous), and the first lessons in finding a balance.

And imo 15-16 year old brains go through a similar phase again... not to what is forbidden, but just do what they like even if it annoys somebody else. And just like a 2 year old they refuse to admit to what they did, blaming others, denial, etc even if you had your nose on it.

Funny, but also frustrating periods :-p