Bell of the Ball Wins or Does She?

[daizyblackrose]

I was wondering what about a dream I had this morning.

In the dream I was at what looked to be a high school dance or ball. Everyone was dressed real fancy like & they were going crown one of the girls. The girl that got the crown was my alter ego & I was trying to get on stage with her. Seeing as I knew that she shouldn't be the only one getting that crown, but the other people around her were saying "No you can't be up here it's her crown." I told them it was not right cause her & I were one in the same person. But they turned on me & went back to what they were doing before. I snuck up behind her & just stood there. But when people started to look at her funny I ducked down onto the floor where no one could see me. After a point I left the room & hoped my alter ego enjoyed her victory for the time being. The dream ends as I exit the door.

By the way alter ego is DaizyBlackrose & in the dream it was Daizy vs Devona.(Real Me)  I just wonder what it means at this point in time?
I just wonder if I am the true bell of the ball or if Daizy is?

[Rook]

Hi Daizy/Devona

Could you be a bit jealous of recognition perhaps placed on Daizy's head rather than yours (crowning achievement)?  It sounds like there is an interplay between you and your alter ego.

You are of course your alter ego, but you are not recognised as that, and perhaps feel unrewarded?

Does that make any sense?  It is applicable to me, maybe I should swipe my alter egos crown... which is me at the moment since I am being that alter ego right now...  So does that mean my alter ego will protect that crown from me?  hmmm

It just means coming out of my shell and embracing myself for what I am...

Whoa, getting off topic.

The conclusion of the dream you allow your alter ego to recieve the attention now, but perhaps intend to shift some of the alter ego's functions more to your true self?

What do  ya reckon?

Rook

[daizyblackrose]

It's funny how that came to be, but yeah I see where things might have gone unnoticed. I've been doing things lately that I normaly  don't do but have been getting praise from my hubby about.  Of course this is not type of scene I've thought of them two interacting with each other in. I wrote a poem about the two a long while back & the scene was much darker in my mind at that time.  Part of me thinks the dream is part two to that poem also. This one was (The aftermath).  The poem is named Mirror & it's in the poems forum. If that's the case then I am doom. Cause My alter ego is not the nice one out of the two, she is dark side of me. The only good point to her is that she is more outgoing then the real me. Cause I am for the most part shy & kind from what I have been told that is.

[sweetsunray]

Hmmm, I used to think of myself as "me" and then there was my "dark side, bad side". I thought of her like that from a very young age until almost the end of my identity crisis therapy when I was 25-26. Without going into the causes and personal story behind either the crisis as well as the alter ego, there came a day that I looked into the mirror and said out loud, "You know what, I have the right to be a bad persons at times, to be a b***h, to be angry, to think of myself, to be selfish, etc..." A week after that I announced my therapy group I saw myself as ready to leave the therapy (which I followed in group for 1.5 year). It was the last day I ever thought of myself as myself + an alter ego. Personally I think we kinda invent this "alter ego" in part to blame it for the things we are not succesful in, and in that way prevent ourselves from taking responsibility for what we do ourselves, even if we have the right not to be an angel. I think this dream is questioning this rooted vision of yourself split in two, or that it's a wake up call to merge the two, because in this case, your alter ego has become an acceptable personality, since she was praised. Anyway, in the end, you are yourself, in all shades of gray. There is no good or bad, just you, and what you may have always considered a weakness may be a strength, and what you may have always considered a strength may be a weakness.