Jokes for the day.

[prasanna]

Jokes

A Way to Save Your Marriage

A young husband with an inferiority complex insisted he was just a little pebble on a vast beach.

The marriage counselor, trying to be creative, told him, "If you wish to save your marriage, you'd better be a little boulder."


Going Out In Style

Unable to attend the funeral after his father died, a son who lived far away called his brother and told him, "Do something nice for Dad and send me the bill."

Later, he got a bill for $200.00, which he paid. The next month, he got another bill for $200.00, which he also paid, figuring it was some incidental expense.

Bills for $200.00 kept arriving every month, and finally the man called his brother again to find out what was going on.

"Well," said the other brother, "you said to do something nice for Dad. So I rented him a tuxedo."



Flustered

As an instructor in driver education at the local area High School, I've learned that even the brightest students can become flustered behind the wheel.

One day I had three beginners in the car, each scheduled to drive for 30 minutes.

When the first student had completed his time, I asked him to change places with one of the others.

Gripping the wheel tightly and staring straight ahead, he asked in a shaky voice, "Should I stop the car first?"



The Priest and the Bum

A drunk that smelled like a brewery got on a subway one day. He sat down next to a priest. The drunk's shirt was stained, his face was full of bright red lipstick, and he had a half empty bottle of wine sticking out of his pocket.

He opened he opened his newspaper and started reading. A couple of minutes later he asked the priest, "Father what causes arthritis"?

"Mister, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap wicked women, too much alcohol and contempt for your fellow man."

"Geez, I'll be darned," uttered the drunk and returned to reading his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he said turned to the man and apologized.

"I'm sorry son, I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"

"I don't, father. I was just reading in the paper that the Pope has arthritis..