Reading Request for 2008

[PrincessinVain]

After a heartbreaking 2007 ( in terms of lovelife ) and a pretty good one ( in terms of business ), and a pretty stressful one ( in terms of health ) - may I know what's in store for me this 2008? In terms of lovelife , career, business, and "me", since I'm turning 25 this 2008 ( drats ).

I'd appreciate it

[eye_of_tiger]

Hey! Turning 25 years of age is not so bad after all, when I have almost exactly 30 years more on the clock than you have. You may feel that life is effectively passing you by, but your age is more in your mind than in your spirit, and I know of 90 year olds who would put both of us to shame with their own incredible enthusiasm for life in general. The value of a life is not measured by age markers, but by the journey we have each taken in order to get from one to the next, and the type of person we are inside, rather than judging this entirely by outward appearances and the number of wrinkles we have.

Often if we feel that we have at least made significant positive progress in other life areas which are important to us, then it makes our disappointments in areas of concern at least a little more bearable. From what you have just told me most areas other than perhaps your love life have been going along fairly well up until now. It should therefore be far less possible for your mind to convince you that your life is without hope, as you have many other positive life experiences to draw strength from, to help you to keep looking for a suitable life partner, especially as you are only relatively recently suffering from a broken and deeply wounded heart. But the need to express love and to be valued and respected in return for being the person whom we already are is I feel our greatest spiritual need, and therefore happiness in other areas in our life does not give us the comfort we would have normally expected to, if we are still single, feeling lonely and unloved. You could say that our heart is no longer in it? Our life and the world at large instead of being being viewed as a spectrum of vivid colours, appears only to us as blacks and whites (mostly blacks).

While I know that this is easier said than done for someone like myself who is not in your situation and is not therefore so emotionally involved with it's outcome to offer advice, I would make the simple observation that you are currently carrying too much negative emotional baggage with you from your previous broken relationship into any future ones, in order to give either yourself or a possible partner a fair go. If you know what is meant by wearing your heart upon your sleeve, then you will at least understand what I am trying to get at here. Even if it has already been anything up to 12 months since your love life took a distinct downward dive, I sense that you still feel a great sense of affection towards this man, and that although your mind is telling you that it is over, your heart is still unable to let him go. You are still in the process of grieving for a relationship and lost love that will never be, but whoever said that the human heart was logical?

On the basis of this reading, I would expect that while there will be further opportunities for you to meet your soul mate over the next year or so, that you still have a lot of inner work to do, in getting clearer in your own mind what you expect to gain from your closest relationships. You may or may not need to seek professional help in doing this, and please also watch your health as in your present sensitive condition you are more vulnerable to any bug which is presently doing the rounds. Without denying what your heart is trying to tell you and unintentionally keeping out all positive feelings along with the negative ones, your most urgent need is to develop a thicker emotional skin. At present by wearing your wounded heart upon your sleeve, potentially anything that a man says will be the wrong thing to say. Also do not fall into the all too common trap of spending your time with your prospective partner talking about the man you have just parted with, or worse comparing the two of them whenever you are given a chance to do so. This will be almost guaranteed to put any man off of going out with you if he begins to feel that he is attempting to fill someone else's shoes, and is found to be lacking by you in many different days.

If writing down the positive qualities you are looking for in a man plus those more negative ones you could never live with helps you to clarify your own ideas as to the best type of man for you, then please go ahead. Then visit the places where you would most expect to find the type of person you just described. Draw upon some of the extra inner strength you have already gained from your personal victories in other life areas, in order to increase your own feelings of self worth specifically with regards to matters of the heart.

2008 could possibly turn out to be the beginning of a new and much more happier love life for you, but without first doing the inner work involved with the purpose of shedding some of that extra emotional baggage that is weighing you down at present, I sense that you will not be able to take full advantage of any romantic opportunities which will come your way during the coming months. Do not listen to anyone who tells you that by now you should have got over him, as human beings vary widely in how long we need in order to begin to allow our hearts to heal. You may need more than 12 months. Only you and possibly a professional counsellor can decide when the time is right for you to begin looking for your man again.

Hoping that these insights have both helped you and have gone at least in some small way towards lifting your spirits,

Love, Light and Healing,

eye_of_tiger

[PrincessinVain]

Wow, I am stunned. Everything you have said is true.

Thank you for your advice.I think I'm just too faint-hearted or weak-hearted that I still feel bad until now. But then, I am trying my best not to be affected too much because he was not worth it at all.

I'd rather focus more on me this year in learning various stuff than wallow and mope around wasting time.

[PrincessinVain]

Hi, eye_of_tiger,

Just a follow up, I was able to overcome the problem I had this December, and I feel like a new leaf. I've been enjoying my social circles, and I feel that I have attracted attention of some, further boosting my self esteem.

I just have this problem with someone - who appears to be very elusive, but yet, I am very interested in. Should I go on with this ordeal, or should I just give it up?

[eye_of_tiger]

Thanking you for your very positive feedback and kind words of appreciation.

No reading I can give you should ever take the place of you deciding whether or not to make your interest in him known.

What I said in your previous reading which suggested that something like this might happen still effectively stands.

On the basis of this reading, I would expect that while there will be further opportunities for you to meet your soul mate over the next year or so, that you still have a lot of inner work to do, in getting clearer in your own mind what you expect to gain from your closest relationships.

 

You appear to have made quite a bit of progress in boosting your self esteem and having an active social life, but do not make the common mistake of believing that if you cannot have this man in your life then he could not be one of your soul mates, and that it is either him or nobody left for you.

If you do decide in the end that he is worth getting to know better, do not do it because you incorrectly believed that I told you in a reading that it was necessarily meant to be, but rather because your own instincts are telling you that you have a real chance of finally discovering some well deserved feelings of love and happiness in your life.

You will never really know if you could have had made it work, if you do not at least show him that you are interested. Do not turn it into more of an ordeal than it needs to be by being your own worst enemy, and giving up before you have first given both yourself and him a fair chance.

L&L,

eye_of_tiger  

[PrincessinVain]

Dear eye_of_tiger,

Thank you for your prompt reply. Your first reply really helped me through my heartbreak and now I'm bright and shiny, I forgot all about the betrayal and heartbreak last December, but now, just a bit depressed.

Please be assured that I am not pressured by your reading to deem this certain man to be "the one". I've been eyeing him for the longest time, and he surfaced about the same time as the man from my December heartbreak did. I'm quite interested with him, and the moment I first saw him, I just knew in my heart that I would want to take a chance with this person for I could actually see myself loving this person.

The problem is - with him, I do not know if he is interested. He has been elusive most of the time, and very coy. Fate has also hindered us so much, I don't know. I just would not want to be humiliated when I finally learn that he isn't really interested at all. Though I really really want to get the chance to know this person better.

[eye_of_tiger]

The problem is - with him, I do not know if he is interested. He has been elusive most of the time, and very coy. Fate has also hindered us so much, I don't know. I just would not want to be humiliated when I finally learn that he isn't really interested at all. Though I really really want to get the chance to know this person better.

Without wanting to sound too judgemental of you as my friend, while I completely agree with you that a big part of the problems you are experiencing in determining whether he is equally interested in you are largely his responsibility, your understandable fear of being rejected and therefore what you perceive as being humiliated is also playing a significant role in all this.

I never suggested that it would be easy, but if I were you I would much prefer to know for certain whether or not the relationship might have had a chance of working if I had only had the courage and persevered (only you are viewing being rejected on the first attempt as a valid basis for feeling humiliated), rather than having to live the rest of my life regretting never knowing whether or not it could have.

Human beings in general make terrible mind readers?

If you are eventually rejected (and I am not saying you will be), at least you will now know this for certain, and can subsequently look forwards to further opportunities for love and romance with another man. One who is both capable of and willing to offer you the type of deep and lasting love you so richly deserve.

Hoping that you will find these added comments helpful,

eye_of_tiger