To my dear friend Sunia, :smt017
Exactly why you should see yourself being back here asking for help as being unfortunate honestly escapes, me as no man or woman is an island unto him or herself, and helping is what we are here for. The fact that you had so much faith that things would work out between you as a couple that you moved to another country to be with him shows just how committed you are to the relationship, and at first I believe so was he. A rocky start simply means that there was and still is considerable room for improvement by both of you (so what's new).
With me not being able to directly read his intentions and thoughts towards you through a third party reading, I told you at the time of your previous reading that any predictions made using the more indirect method would be more unreliable, not that this is probably much compensation or comfort when the relationship is currently as you have indicated hit a particularly rough patch.
With you now being totally financially dependent on him (why are you not able to work), this certainly adds an extra level of complication to any advice this reading can potentially offer you, but only of course if things have deteriorated between you to the point that you need to get out of it ASAP, or before serious and permanent damage is done to your sense of self confidence and self respect.
Your reading is telling me that this was always going to be even at the best of times a fiery relationship, mainly because each of you in your own ways are presently in the ongoing process of establishing who you are as individuals, and the huge friction this can so easily create between you is basically making each of you feel trapped in a situation which is no longer under your control, and that you are feeling spiritually smothered by your partner.
The good news is that I do not feel based upon this single reading that your relationship is unrecoverable or unfixable over the next six months commonly thought to be covered by a reading of the type given by me here on this forum. In other words while I can still see significant challenges ahead for you if you are both still willing to swallow some of your self pride and co-operatively work together to make it through this, I do not yet view this as being without hope.
Thanking you sincerely for your kind offer to provide this humble reader with whatever information you are able to about your partner's past (which I sense was anything but being a happy one overall) which is both relevant and useful in helping the healing to occur, but no thanks.
I feel that in this case at least extra information beyond what you have already told me would only serve as a further distraction from the issues presently in hand, and quickly become a convenient excuse to give up prematurely when there is still I believe a valid reason for you to be hopeful of a relatively civilised cessation of hostilities during the next six to twelve months.
But there is a persistent point of weakness or unknown factor in the equation of your situation in the way of me not being able to accurately predict that things will eventually work out OK for the both of you at a level of certainty on which you could pin your faith that you will successfully weather the storm, and come out of this smelling like roses.
Not only is this because of me not being able to directly read his thoughts and intentions towards you (the reason was given earlier), but human beings in general of either gender are unpredictable in how they will behave at any time when they are subjected to unusually high levels of stress, as has been clearly demonstrated recently during a series of major natural disasters which have happened over here in Eastern Australia. And can any of us honestly say with a strong level of assuredness that we would not do the same thing if we were in their shoes, and they were in ours? Cast the first stone at them, at your own peril.
I want to be happy with him and I want to be more myself.
The two things are not mutually exclusive of one another, although the learning curve will always be a steep one. These are perfectly normal goals for a couple who are just starting out on their shared journey together, but putting this politely a lot of water has passed under your bridge since then for you to now be able to confidently say that you are still beginners when it comes to how your life and relationship experiences since you first met each other have permanently changed you (for better or for worse). Neither of you are therefore exactly who you were when you moved to be with him, and you may have effectively burned your bridges behind you. So the only way to move again is to move forwards.
Possibly it is partly because I do not get any sense of satisfaction whatsoever from seeing my friends hurting that I tend to be the eternal optimist when it comes to predicting whether or not your relationship will ultimately survive (readers are also human and consequently have feeling's just like everyone else), and possibly it is partly because my inner guidance through this reading is telling me that this is true. I could also be picking up intuitively on your wishful thinking and only unconsciously telling you what I know you want more than anything to hear.
But when I consulted the Tarot about this, I do feel that there is an element of inevitability or of it being part of the plan that you will each in your different ways give this relationship your best shot, even if the final outcome does not completely come up to or meet your earlier expectations.
All of the four Pages in the Tarot deck are seen as messengers or heralds of something important which your inner self still has to tell you, and specifically your focus card for this reading which was BTW the
Page of Swords strongly suggests to me that this recovery or healing of your wounds can only happen through constant effort and hard work by both of you.
The Swords suit is usually associated with us cutting through all the bovine droppings to finally and hopefully arrive at the core of the truth, and with you and your guy honest two way communication of your thoughts and feelings is seen to be the only realistic solution to your problems.
Unless you really start communicating again instead of attempting to read each other's minds and show through both through your words and actions that you are each in this for the long haul, then I do not like your chances much of pulling this off. And including myself in this rule, human beings on average tend to make terrible mind readers. We as a species often "read" things into our situation which have little or no basis in reality.
Start using your love and intelligence instead of your negative imagination in order to make any worthwhile predictions about where your relationship is going from now on. Slowly but surely re-establish degree of mutual trust (which must be earned) and reopen honest two way communication through both your words and actions.
Finally place the rest of the mess in the more than capable, wise and compassionate hands of your own Higher Self (the atomic particle of God which exists within all of us, and whom lives and learns during countless lifetimes through our Earthly experiences of what it is like to be a spiritual being like we are, but one whom is living in this physical world and universe). Look for slow, safe and lasting improvement or progress from him and your relationship, rather than holding out indefinitely for the ideal or perfect.
Love, Light and Healing,
EoT
. I am back to ask for help unfortunately... My relationship doesn't seem to be well. We had a rocky start 2 years ago, but I still had faith and moved to his country to start a life with him. I am still totally dependent (financially) on him as just 2 months a go I got my residence permit. Since the beginning it has been a fight for me against his past (I will say in private message if needed) and that makes me insecure...
