Mangomom, may I receive an Akashic Reading?

[venusian]

Hi Mangomom!

Having read through many of the posts here, I have decided to request an Akashic Record reading.  I am very interested in the past life influences that come with such readings.

 These past two years have been an extremely difficult, and self-reflective time for me.  I feel an urgency to be doing something, though I am lost as to what my purpose is.  I feel that I am carrying a substantial amount of past-life karma that is keeping me from moving forward.  I have many phobias and anxieties that I have not resolved since childhood;
I have a hard time putting myself in social situations and holding a job, due to extreme self-consciousness and an extreme lack of faith in my intellectual abilities.  Within myself I know that I am young and such situations will not prevail indefinitely.  I just need some extra guidance right now to help me move forward- I have been living in isolation, without the comfort of friends, for these two years (much of it, admittedly, is self-imposed- but nevertheless, feels like imprisonment)
I feel that it is time for me to get myself out of this phase in life and find some support from others.  Even a little bit will do.  If you could be of help, I would be eternally grateful for your time, insight, and advice.  

A little direction as to what my life purpose is, and how I can start becoming more confident/ independent, would mean the world to me right now,
Thank you so much!
I will PM you my name and other such information.

[MangoMom]

Venusian, It would be my honor to access your records and see what information we can receive.  Send me your full name, if your are female and married, I need your married name.  Blessings,
MangoMom

[venusian]

Hi MangoMom, thanks for your response! I have already sent you my name, but I will send again in case it was not received.

Thank you! I look forward to hearing from you.  :)

[MangoMom]

Dearest Venusian,

Thank you for your patience while waiting for your reading.  I have opened your records and here was your concerns

These past two years have been an extremely difficult, and self-reflective time for me.  I feel an urgency to be doing something, though I am lost as to what my purpose is.  I feel that I am carrying a substantial amount of past-life karma that is keeping me from moving forward.  I have many phobias and anxieties that I have not resolved since childhood;
I have a hard time putting myself in social situations and holding a job, due to extreme self-consciousness and an extreme lack of faith in my intellectual abilities.  Within myself I know that I am young and such situations will not prevail indefinitely.  I just need some extra guidance right now to help me move forward- I have been living in isolation, without the comfort of friends, for these two years (much of it, admittedly, is self-imposed- but nevertheless, feels like imprisonment)
I feel that it is time for me to get myself out of this phase in life and find some support from others.  Even a little bit will do.  If you could be of help, I would be eternally grateful for your time, insight, and advice.  

The first thing I felt is that this did not come through your past lives but from very early childhood.  Your parents were very good parents but they are not good a sharing or showing emotion.  Your fear is showing your emotions to others which trickles down to your self consciousness.  Due to the extreme self-consciousness you experience phobias in crowds and in casual gatherings with others your age.  Your firs thing to do is to say the following prayer for 47 days the second prayer for 32 days.  (I do not understand the reasons for the number of days, I just share the information)  The first prayer is the forgiveness prayer, which is forgiving yourself and others for anything in the past and present.  The second prayer is for any outside influences you feel may have followed you from a past life.  

FORGIVENESS PRAYER
If there is anyone or anything that has hurt me in the past, knowingly or unknowingly, I forgive and release it.  If I have hurt anyone or anything in the past, knowingly or unknowingly, I forgive and release it.  This I ask for the highest good of all concerned.

PRAYER FOR RELEASING OUTSIDE INFLUENCES

If what I am experiencing is not mine, may God have his shield around me and I release whatever it may be to Him.  This I ask for the highest good of others and myself.

You are a beautiful person inside and out, many people are drawn to you because of you gentle love and concern.  You have a special gift in calming those around you.  Your purpose in this life is within you, your path has been blocked by your fears, be assured the fear of the unknown is always present, I want to offer this little prayer when yo become concerned with your self-consciousness.  TAKE ME BY THE HAND LORD, GUIDE ME THROUGH THIS DAY, LET EVERY THOUGHT, WORD AND DEED BE ALWAYS IN YOUR WAY.  These prayers are very simple and to the point, no need to mince words.  You are a very young soul and have only had 2 past lives, but you learned well in both of them.  You current life span will be the greatest of all.  Your self assurance will begin to show through within the next week, you will say and do things you never dreamed would be possible.  You will truly surprise yourself and smile, keep the smiles going, the frowns you have when others are not around will become constant if you do not start now by smiling at yourself.  Do not take things so serious, keep in mind, "How important is this?" it will release much of the concerns.

Blessings hon, and keep us posted.  We love to hear feedback.

MangoMom

[venusian]

Hi Mangomom,
Thanks so much for your response! I am really grateful that you took the time out to offer me these prayers.  They are already a big help.

You are correct about my parents.  They supplied food and shelter but were not present in my earlier years - they had to work - and so I do not feel that the family bond was ever truly formed in a healthy way.  As a result I was babysat by my older brother who had severe anger issues of his own, and bullied me in a way that was psychologically damaging for me.  I lived in an environment where there was constant fear, intimidation, anxiety, rejection, instead of love.   When the time came for me to start attending school, I was fearful of my teachers and classmates because I had not developed the ability to trust others.  It was hard to make friends so I was often outcast and thought of as strange.

This of course has followed me into adulthood.  The world feels unsafe for me and I find myself subconsciously looking for the love - the security - the feeling of being safe and protected - that I did not receive from my parents.  

I am trying to release it now.  To be honest, I do not know how exactly, and I am very scared.  I am saying the prayers.  What I truly want is to be independent of the past and to start living my own life. I don't want to worry about receiving love and nurture.  I wish to feel fully secure within myself because I know, only then can I be strong enough to help others in my position.

Thank you for your kindness, Mangomom,
I will keep you posted.

[MangoMom]

Oh hon, my heart goes out to you for the difficult life you have lived, but I truly believe that it will be a benefit to you in the future.  Keep these prayers with you and continue with them as instructed, I am so glad that you can see some relief now, it will continue.  Blessings to you and know that you will do better each day.  Sending Love, Light and Laughter
MangoMom