Hi Eye of Tiger
Impressive work on the site!
I was wondering if I could trouble you for a reading.
I was wondering if you could provide some insight into my love life for the future?
Another thing is that I tend to lose friendships and romantic relationships quite frequently (they just disappear into thin air, and there is nothing i consciously do to bring this about). I have done self help etc and treat my friends well etc, but this pattern still ensues. I was wondering if you could shed some light on this, in your reading.
Please phrase the query as you wish.
Many thanks
Asti
Reading Request for Eye of Tiger?
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eye_of_tiger
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A reading would be my pleasure, and not any trouble
http://mysticboard.org/vi ... hp?t=78934
Asti,
Welcome to the forum, and thanking you for the compliment.
If you have already looked at my sticky posting on precisely this subject (link provided above), you will know that we do not attempt to predict your future love life through these readings, for reasons which are explained in more detail than I wish to repeat here.
But your request is more I feel concerned with learning what you could reasonably do in order to greatly increase the chances that you will meet that special person within the period of the next six months which is thought to be covered by this reading. Insights are not always necessarily predictions?
My impressions are that you feel relatively powerless to change what that future will be, mainly as a result of numerous failed friendships and romantic relationships which have effectively destroyed your belief in yourself when it comes to matters of the heart.
For it is your damaged through repeated negative experiences belief in yourself which the reading clearly identifies as being at the core of your problems in forming close human relationships, and equally importantly being able to keep the relationship moving in a positive direction once you have decided whether or not you both wish to take things to the next level and become more than good friends.
I feel that you hit the nail on the head and basically answered your own question when you wrote in your request, and I quote......
But unfortunately for you and everyone looking for love most of what we do within a relationship is to some varying extent unconscious. And this is precisely what your reading is trying to point out to you. Unbeknownst to yourself you are unconsciously and therefore quite unintentionally working t cross purposes.
While consciously you are telling other people primarily through your words and body language that you want this relationship to be a successful one, unconsciously you are communicating to them that you do not want to risk having your feelings hurt ever again, so they should stay away from you and leave you to be miserable by yourself. In other words you are continually unconsciously putting out mixed signals to them about whether you want to have a relationship which goes any further than simple companionship.
Not surprisingly when you are communicating mixed signals to your prospective future partners you can only expect to get mixed signals from them in return. If you misinterpret their mixed response as being a sign that you were right all along and there is really something wrong with you that is driving them away from you (none of which BTW is true), this only reinforces your lack of belief in yourself as being lovable.
So the more you get angry and frustrated with and beat up on yourself for one friendship or relationship after another mysteriously with no obvious reason failing, the more mixed and confused become the signals you are putting out into your surroundings. And your personal energy field or aura will in turn act to push them further away from you like the sharp quills on a hedgehog, when consciously you want the opposite to happen.
You want to be closer to them than to anyone else, but at the same time you are unconsciously telling them to keep their distance. This is like being at war with yourself on an almost daily basis, and over time these mixed and confused signals continue to increasingly undermine any of your courageous efforts to turn things around in a more positive direction.
While your situation is not hopeless, as the months and years of this inner conflict between your conscious and unconscious mind accumulate, things can get significantly more challenging and bogged down in negative emotional baggage. In other words although it is not beyond any sense of hope that you will eventually find the true and lasting type of love which you deserve to find as much as the next person does, it would be dishonest and yes cruel of me to tell you that I believe that you could turn this around virtually overnight.
When we are trying to change long term habits which are working against us having harmonious and loving relationships, we are looking for a slow but progressive improvement and not for instant perfection. There is always no matter how hard we try and how much professional help if any we get in changing our signals, a significant lag or delay before you can reasonably expect to see some solid, lasting results for all your efforts and sacrifices. And this is usually where people like yourself become their own worst enemy.
During the period of lag or delay between changing your habits and finally seeing some positive rewards or results you will almost certainly become even more sensitive to even the slightest indication in your own eyes that what you are doing to help yourself is not only not working, but that it is only making things worse than they already are. When you begin to believe that everything you do makes things worse than they already are, why would you want to keep trying?
The reading tells me that you are currently experiencing only one more of a series of such lags or delays. It is saying that you actually already have a fairly deep insight about what you need to change, but that you have limited ideas about what you can do about it after your efforts in the past have apparently failed on numerous occasions. Hence your reason for requesting further insight from me through this reading.
You are secretly from your conscious self hoping that I will come up with a plan which involves little or no risk that your feelings will get hurt again, when there is no relationship on this planet that could even begin to make such a promise, or give you a 100% guarantee that you will never unintentionally hurt your partner's feelings in return.
If you never take any risks you will never achieve anything which is important to you in any areas of your life. You need to minimize what risks you do take and make them as much as possible planned or calculated ones. While you should never enter into any relationship with both your eyes tightly closed as love can be blind, do not go out looking for trouble where it may not be.
You need to remain vigilant for any solid evidence that the relationship is going downhill fast, without becoming paranoiac about seeing disaster everywhere you look (a balanced approach). Trust is two way thing. If you never to some extent trust someone to do the right thing by you most of the time (as none of us is perfect), how can you then reasonably expect others to trust you to do the same by them?
God bless, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you and your family from me and mine,
EoT :smt114
Asti,
Welcome to the forum, and thanking you for the compliment.
If you have already looked at my sticky posting on precisely this subject (link provided above), you will know that we do not attempt to predict your future love life through these readings, for reasons which are explained in more detail than I wish to repeat here.
But your request is more I feel concerned with learning what you could reasonably do in order to greatly increase the chances that you will meet that special person within the period of the next six months which is thought to be covered by this reading. Insights are not always necessarily predictions?
My impressions are that you feel relatively powerless to change what that future will be, mainly as a result of numerous failed friendships and romantic relationships which have effectively destroyed your belief in yourself when it comes to matters of the heart.
For it is your damaged through repeated negative experiences belief in yourself which the reading clearly identifies as being at the core of your problems in forming close human relationships, and equally importantly being able to keep the relationship moving in a positive direction once you have decided whether or not you both wish to take things to the next level and become more than good friends.
I feel that you hit the nail on the head and basically answered your own question when you wrote in your request, and I quote......
I completely agree that you are highly unlikely to be doing anything consciously with the intention to sabotage your relationship. I think that it would be an insult to your intelligence and great capacity for truly loving another person for anyone to even suggest that you would be deliberately attempting to torpedo your own love life. There are indeed some people who make no secret of consciously doing this, but they are deeply disturbed individuals and I do not and cannot see you as one of these tortured souls.there is nothing i consciously do to bring this about
But unfortunately for you and everyone looking for love most of what we do within a relationship is to some varying extent unconscious. And this is precisely what your reading is trying to point out to you. Unbeknownst to yourself you are unconsciously and therefore quite unintentionally working t cross purposes.
While consciously you are telling other people primarily through your words and body language that you want this relationship to be a successful one, unconsciously you are communicating to them that you do not want to risk having your feelings hurt ever again, so they should stay away from you and leave you to be miserable by yourself. In other words you are continually unconsciously putting out mixed signals to them about whether you want to have a relationship which goes any further than simple companionship.
Not surprisingly when you are communicating mixed signals to your prospective future partners you can only expect to get mixed signals from them in return. If you misinterpret their mixed response as being a sign that you were right all along and there is really something wrong with you that is driving them away from you (none of which BTW is true), this only reinforces your lack of belief in yourself as being lovable.
So the more you get angry and frustrated with and beat up on yourself for one friendship or relationship after another mysteriously with no obvious reason failing, the more mixed and confused become the signals you are putting out into your surroundings. And your personal energy field or aura will in turn act to push them further away from you like the sharp quills on a hedgehog, when consciously you want the opposite to happen.
You want to be closer to them than to anyone else, but at the same time you are unconsciously telling them to keep their distance. This is like being at war with yourself on an almost daily basis, and over time these mixed and confused signals continue to increasingly undermine any of your courageous efforts to turn things around in a more positive direction.
While your situation is not hopeless, as the months and years of this inner conflict between your conscious and unconscious mind accumulate, things can get significantly more challenging and bogged down in negative emotional baggage. In other words although it is not beyond any sense of hope that you will eventually find the true and lasting type of love which you deserve to find as much as the next person does, it would be dishonest and yes cruel of me to tell you that I believe that you could turn this around virtually overnight.
When we are trying to change long term habits which are working against us having harmonious and loving relationships, we are looking for a slow but progressive improvement and not for instant perfection. There is always no matter how hard we try and how much professional help if any we get in changing our signals, a significant lag or delay before you can reasonably expect to see some solid, lasting results for all your efforts and sacrifices. And this is usually where people like yourself become their own worst enemy.
During the period of lag or delay between changing your habits and finally seeing some positive rewards or results you will almost certainly become even more sensitive to even the slightest indication in your own eyes that what you are doing to help yourself is not only not working, but that it is only making things worse than they already are. When you begin to believe that everything you do makes things worse than they already are, why would you want to keep trying?
The reading tells me that you are currently experiencing only one more of a series of such lags or delays. It is saying that you actually already have a fairly deep insight about what you need to change, but that you have limited ideas about what you can do about it after your efforts in the past have apparently failed on numerous occasions. Hence your reason for requesting further insight from me through this reading.
You are secretly from your conscious self hoping that I will come up with a plan which involves little or no risk that your feelings will get hurt again, when there is no relationship on this planet that could even begin to make such a promise, or give you a 100% guarantee that you will never unintentionally hurt your partner's feelings in return.
If you never take any risks you will never achieve anything which is important to you in any areas of your life. You need to minimize what risks you do take and make them as much as possible planned or calculated ones. While you should never enter into any relationship with both your eyes tightly closed as love can be blind, do not go out looking for trouble where it may not be.
You need to remain vigilant for any solid evidence that the relationship is going downhill fast, without becoming paranoiac about seeing disaster everywhere you look (a balanced approach). Trust is two way thing. If you never to some extent trust someone to do the right thing by you most of the time (as none of us is perfect), how can you then reasonably expect others to trust you to do the same by them?
God bless, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you and your family from me and mine,
EoT :smt114
Hi
Many thanks for your reading. I was unable to log into my old account, hence setting up a new one.
Your reading was spot on. I am in the disposition that you make mention of, I wish I could look at things more positively , but it is hard going at the moment.
I am 30 and I have never had a relationship to date. The pattern that has enused to date is I am invisible to attractive/eligible men and am treated like a sexual object by the remainder, and with no respect by either. Therefore, it is quite hard to remain optimistic about this area of things. In regards to friendships - as you noted, people disappear without a trace. For example, I had a 6 -12 month friendship with 3 people that I thought I was good friends with and one ended the friendship as I didn't wish to be in the company and treated aggresively (the latter litreally happened) by a rapist friend of hers, that she held in higher esteem to me (I have provided her with year long emotional and financial support) and the latter disappeared once my life got challenging (i lost my job). At the monent, I have no stable friendships, and you are right in that I don't even really consider romantic relationships as part of my future, for the reasons outlined earlier and also as it is hard to consider oneself eligble/appealing/attractive in anyway when you have never had a relationship.
I have as you noted tried hard with 15 worth of therapy, self help, datings sites, socialising - nothing has changed, so it is hard to keep at it, with no results ever having have been delivered.
Anyway, the purpose of this post was to thank you for your time taken in issuing the reading and also confirm that the content was accurate.
A
Many thanks for your reading. I was unable to log into my old account, hence setting up a new one.
Your reading was spot on. I am in the disposition that you make mention of, I wish I could look at things more positively , but it is hard going at the moment.
I am 30 and I have never had a relationship to date. The pattern that has enused to date is I am invisible to attractive/eligible men and am treated like a sexual object by the remainder, and with no respect by either. Therefore, it is quite hard to remain optimistic about this area of things. In regards to friendships - as you noted, people disappear without a trace. For example, I had a 6 -12 month friendship with 3 people that I thought I was good friends with and one ended the friendship as I didn't wish to be in the company and treated aggresively (the latter litreally happened) by a rapist friend of hers, that she held in higher esteem to me (I have provided her with year long emotional and financial support) and the latter disappeared once my life got challenging (i lost my job). At the monent, I have no stable friendships, and you are right in that I don't even really consider romantic relationships as part of my future, for the reasons outlined earlier and also as it is hard to consider oneself eligble/appealing/attractive in anyway when you have never had a relationship.
I have as you noted tried hard with 15 worth of therapy, self help, datings sites, socialising - nothing has changed, so it is hard to keep at it, with no results ever having have been delivered.
Anyway, the purpose of this post was to thank you for your time taken in issuing the reading and also confirm that the content was accurate.
A
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eye_of_tiger
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I have no idea as to why you are suddenly unable to log onto your old account, but I am glad that your problem did not make you lose contact with us.
You are very welcome for the reading and thanking you in return for your very complete and honest feedback, as this does help me to improve both the quality and usefulness of my readings over time.
I can assure you that I get no sense of personal satisfaction from having some of the reading confirmed in this manner, but it came with a feeling that the worst is now largely behind you and that you therefore have a good reason to hope that such a special person will eventually appear.
Your challenge is mainly to prepare yourself to be able to take maximum advantage of any relationship opportunities which may materialize in the future. Mostly this preparation will be of a mental and emotional nature, as it is important to you making any further progress that you do not drag too much negative emotional baggage with you into any future relationships.
This is of course always much easier said than done, but you will always have whatever moral support that I can realistically provide you with with via the internet to help and support you through the challenges which still lie ahead.
Be kind to yourself as you are the only person whom you will have to live for the rest of your life, whatever else happens relationship wise.
Salutations!
EoT :)
You are very welcome for the reading and thanking you in return for your very complete and honest feedback, as this does help me to improve both the quality and usefulness of my readings over time.
I can assure you that I get no sense of personal satisfaction from having some of the reading confirmed in this manner, but it came with a feeling that the worst is now largely behind you and that you therefore have a good reason to hope that such a special person will eventually appear.
Your challenge is mainly to prepare yourself to be able to take maximum advantage of any relationship opportunities which may materialize in the future. Mostly this preparation will be of a mental and emotional nature, as it is important to you making any further progress that you do not drag too much negative emotional baggage with you into any future relationships.
This is of course always much easier said than done, but you will always have whatever moral support that I can realistically provide you with with via the internet to help and support you through the challenges which still lie ahead.
Be kind to yourself as you are the only person whom you will have to live for the rest of your life, whatever else happens relationship wise.
Salutations!
EoT :)
Hi EOT
I hope you dont mind me asking one alst query about the reading. I refer to your comment "The reading tells me that you are currently experiencing only one more of a series of such lags or delays". I fully understand that readings are not an exact science, however I just wanted to check the accuracy of my understanding. Is your meaning that I have yet another series of lags and delays to experience or that you feel that I am currently experiencing the final lag/delay at this moment in time?
Thanks for your advice and no problem at all if this is one query too many.
A
I hope you dont mind me asking one alst query about the reading. I refer to your comment "The reading tells me that you are currently experiencing only one more of a series of such lags or delays". I fully understand that readings are not an exact science, however I just wanted to check the accuracy of my understanding. Is your meaning that I have yet another series of lags and delays to experience or that you feel that I am currently experiencing the final lag/delay at this moment in time?
Thanks for your advice and no problem at all if this is one query too many.
A
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eye_of_tiger
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While you are still alive, there will never be a final lag or delay
There will always be throughout your entire lifetime varying degrees of lag or delay between your ongoing efforts to make things better, and you actually seeing them getting better.Is your meaning that I have yet another series of lags and delays to experience or that you feel that I am currently experiencing the final lag/delay at this moment in time?
The bad news is that you still have a series of lags and delays to look forward to (progress is rarely if ever in a straight line upwards), no matter how good you are at this, or how much help you get from others. Life just works this way?
The good news is that you will be given all the inner and outer resources you will ever need to help you get through these lags and delays with your sanity and sense of humour both still relatively intact, but not until they re needed. Just because you might not have the resources to deal with a future lag or delay now, does not necessarily mean that you will not have these resources, when the proper time arrives for you to use them.
Does this make things clearer to you now?
L&L,
EoT :smt024
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eye_of_tiger
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.Did you mean 'You' in specific regards to me, 'You' as in all human beings experience this
You (Astinew) as well as all other human beings will always still have a series of lags and delays to look forward to in the future.
Absolutely! YES! This will always continue be true if you are a human being living on this planet.So you feel that I have many more 'lags' and delays to experience, in regards to your feelings from the reading?
The inner changes must come first. The outer signs of these changes may take longer to appear than we are willing to accept, which is why some people give up prematurely when they are unknowingly so close to their goals, because to them no outer, physical signs of success within a very short period of time must necessarily mean that the inner changes not working and will never work.
It is perfectly normal for it to happen this way as many of the changes and improvements which we are trying to bring about in our life unavoidably take both time and perseverance to accomplish.
Human life and the lessons which we all need to learn somehow and sometime just work this way?
EoT
Last Point
Hi EOT
Thank you for your time to date. I have had some time to think about all of this.
I fully accept all that you have said.
I hope you don't mind me asking - I was just wondering and hope this isn't too broad a question- how/why is it that some people I know are from the exact same damaged abusive on all levels childhood/background as me (I have noticed that this usually results in dysfunctional behaviours and situations in adulthood) - yet these people have plenty of date offers and options in that area - despite being of the same background as me.
I acknowledge that everyone has differing experiences etc and there is no 'one size fits all' experience or answer and this isn't what I am asking of you, but I do find it hard to understand that I don't know anyone that for example is 30 and has only ever been on 3 dates in their life (that I had to 'work' for) and all but one resulted in rejection.
I'm sorry to sound -ve but I am trying hard to process all this. I am currently revisiting old self help books today,to help pull me out of this current lag. Im just asking this question to try and get things in perspective, to help me move forward. But please don't worry at all if I have asked too much of you.
Asti
Thank you for your time to date. I have had some time to think about all of this.
I fully accept all that you have said.
I hope you don't mind me asking - I was just wondering and hope this isn't too broad a question- how/why is it that some people I know are from the exact same damaged abusive on all levels childhood/background as me (I have noticed that this usually results in dysfunctional behaviours and situations in adulthood) - yet these people have plenty of date offers and options in that area - despite being of the same background as me.
I acknowledge that everyone has differing experiences etc and there is no 'one size fits all' experience or answer and this isn't what I am asking of you, but I do find it hard to understand that I don't know anyone that for example is 30 and has only ever been on 3 dates in their life (that I had to 'work' for) and all but one resulted in rejection.
I'm sorry to sound -ve but I am trying hard to process all this. I am currently revisiting old self help books today,to help pull me out of this current lag. Im just asking this question to try and get things in perspective, to help me move forward. But please don't worry at all if I have asked too much of you.
Asti
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eye_of_tiger
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Could I please suggest............?
Asti,
No I do not mind you asking, but as your reading is complete and all questions directly related to it have been answered to the best of my abilities (and you are not eligible for another reading in this forum until at least January 17th, 2014), I feel that with this not being a discussion forum that I must now end and lock this thread as it currently stands.
However if you are still interested in having a general discussion with other members about why people with apparently similar backgrounds are affected so differently by their past negative experiences, then please feel free to post your question on the main psychic forum.
http://mysticboard.org/viewforum.php?f=31
Could I please suggest that you should post it in the following form? It removes any personal reference to you, and is not a reading request.
Readings are not allowed on there.
Regards,
EoT :smt006
No I do not mind you asking, but as your reading is complete and all questions directly related to it have been answered to the best of my abilities (and you are not eligible for another reading in this forum until at least January 17th, 2014), I feel that with this not being a discussion forum that I must now end and lock this thread as it currently stands.
However if you are still interested in having a general discussion with other members about why people with apparently similar backgrounds are affected so differently by their past negative experiences, then please feel free to post your question on the main psychic forum.
http://mysticboard.org/viewforum.php?f=31
Could I please suggest that you should post it in the following form? It removes any personal reference to you, and is not a reading request.
Readings are not allowed on there.
I will send you the question through a private message for you to copy and paste to the main psychic forum, if you do decide to go ahead with this.Why is it that some people who apparently come from the exact same damaged, abusive on all levels childhood/background as each other (which often results in them having dysfunctional behaviours and situations in their adulthood), while other people seem to be able to largely shrug off the negative effects of their past, and be able to find love and happiness through their close relationships in spite of everything which has happened to them up until then?
Regards,
EoT :smt006
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