Love Reading
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girlwiththefairytatto
- Posts: 20
- Joined: Mon Mar 03, 2014 12:43 am
Love Reading
I would like a love reading please. I've been seeing someone since December. We have had some problems reccently with him wanting a break and some issues stem from my past and some things I did in the heat of the moment. I want to undo the damage but don't know how. I do care about him and want to salvage things. There are times when I wanted to end things because he has also done things that I wasn't happy with but deep down I still care and really do want to be with him despie everything. I need some guidence in rebuilding things between us. Thanks
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eye_of_tiger
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Your request is very well thought out and expressed, and I plan to give you a reading about it within the next 24 hours.
Undoing the damage between you all too often involves both partners living in and risking becoming permanently trapped in the past.
It does not necessarily have to!
This is not saying that you cannot undo the mistakes of your past, but rather it is emphasizing that the present moment is your only true point of real personal power to have a positive influence over your relationship's future.
Leave the past dead alone and focus exclusively on the present. The lessons of your past are still active now.
Damage can be undone or at least have its negative effects in the present decreased, while you are still moving forwards instead of backwards, and while still minimizing the risks that you could get with the best of intentions to undo the past create new problems, and unintentionally become trapped by these as well as by the original ones.
Be forwards instead of backwards looking?
Stay calm and cool (always easier said than done).
I will see you in the future (by about one day),
EoT :smt003
Undoing the damage between you all too often involves both partners living in and risking becoming permanently trapped in the past.
It does not necessarily have to!
This is not saying that you cannot undo the mistakes of your past, but rather it is emphasizing that the present moment is your only true point of real personal power to have a positive influence over your relationship's future.
Leave the past dead alone and focus exclusively on the present. The lessons of your past are still active now.
Damage can be undone or at least have its negative effects in the present decreased, while you are still moving forwards instead of backwards, and while still minimizing the risks that you could get with the best of intentions to undo the past create new problems, and unintentionally become trapped by these as well as by the original ones.
Be forwards instead of backwards looking?
Stay calm and cool (always easier said than done).
I will see you in the future (by about one day),
EoT :smt003
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girlwiththefairytatto
- Posts: 20
- Joined: Mon Mar 03, 2014 12:43 am
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eye_of_tiger
- Site Admin
- Posts: 8490
- Joined: Wed Apr 11, 2007 12:47 am
- Location: Adelaide, South Australia
- Contact:
Negative emotional baggage, dragged from one relationship into the next
It appears from your response that I have already before your reading has even begun correctly identified the main problem which you have been experiencing within your relationship. That is how you can undo the mistakes of your past, without simultaneously becoming trapped in that past. You are being encouraged to live more and more often in the present moment, and work on your past mistakes from there.
Possibly the most significant sentence I wrote in the posting which turned out in hindsight to lead you into this reading was as follows.....
What is it then which allows the honest mistakes of your past to continue to have their damaging effects in the present moment? Negative unconscious thought patterns. Thought patterns which have been unintentionally built up and reinforced over many years. What is it which could allow unless you can stop it from happening the same mistakes of your past to continue from the present into your future? The same negative unconscious thought patterns which allowed these mistakes to reach the present moment.
These self destructive thought patterns are often also called negative emotional baggage. When we enter upon a new relationship we (both men and women) all too often drag the negative emotional baggage of past failed relationships behind them into the new relationship. By the time you have gone through several failed relationships the amount of negative emotional baggage which you are carrying or dragging behind you by then must be truly enormous.
So in summary, this reading is telling you that the only effective way for you and your man to iron out your differences is to first realise that both of you are carrying or dragging behind you a large amount of negative emotional baggage from past failed relationships, as well as from your respective upbringings. For children often carry the negative emotional baggage of their parents along with them into their own adult lives. We are often indeed victims of other victims.
Focus your energies upon helping each other to discover why you feel the way that you do, instead of telling them that they should not be feeling that way. It will be easier for your partner to open up to you about his emotional baggage (as there is also positive emotional baggage) if you honestly tell him about your own. If you do not like to be told that you should not be feeling that way, why should he allow you to tell him that? It takes at least two people to tango, or fight like cats and dogs.
The reading suggests that by the two of you exchanging and freely discussing your emotional baggage with the other person, that you are both more likely to recognise that both of you are human and therefore by definition far short of being perfect. If you know that your partner is not perfect, then there is much less pressure on you to convince them that you are without your faults, which can help you both relax your defences and in turn things should greatly improve between you because you now feel that you can be yourself, past mistakes and all.
Healing and blessings to both of you, as well as to your relationship,
eye_of_tiger
Possibly the most significant sentence I wrote in the posting which turned out in hindsight to lead you into this reading was as follows.....
And also may I add the mistakes of your past are still active now in the present moment. The good news is that you do not have to necessarily delve back into the past and risk becoming permanently trapped there to find them, because the mistakes which you have made (the only people who do not make mistakes are those who never achieve anything which is important to them) are still expressing themselves through what is happening or not happening now in your daily life. Which can be a terribly discouraging and depressing thought, or on the other hand can potentially contain the solution to your relationship problem with this man.The lessons of your past are still active now.
What is it then which allows the honest mistakes of your past to continue to have their damaging effects in the present moment? Negative unconscious thought patterns. Thought patterns which have been unintentionally built up and reinforced over many years. What is it which could allow unless you can stop it from happening the same mistakes of your past to continue from the present into your future? The same negative unconscious thought patterns which allowed these mistakes to reach the present moment.
These self destructive thought patterns are often also called negative emotional baggage. When we enter upon a new relationship we (both men and women) all too often drag the negative emotional baggage of past failed relationships behind them into the new relationship. By the time you have gone through several failed relationships the amount of negative emotional baggage which you are carrying or dragging behind you by then must be truly enormous.
So in summary, this reading is telling you that the only effective way for you and your man to iron out your differences is to first realise that both of you are carrying or dragging behind you a large amount of negative emotional baggage from past failed relationships, as well as from your respective upbringings. For children often carry the negative emotional baggage of their parents along with them into their own adult lives. We are often indeed victims of other victims.
Focus your energies upon helping each other to discover why you feel the way that you do, instead of telling them that they should not be feeling that way. It will be easier for your partner to open up to you about his emotional baggage (as there is also positive emotional baggage) if you honestly tell him about your own. If you do not like to be told that you should not be feeling that way, why should he allow you to tell him that? It takes at least two people to tango, or fight like cats and dogs.
The reading suggests that by the two of you exchanging and freely discussing your emotional baggage with the other person, that you are both more likely to recognise that both of you are human and therefore by definition far short of being perfect. If you know that your partner is not perfect, then there is much less pressure on you to convince them that you are without your faults, which can help you both relax your defences and in turn things should greatly improve between you because you now feel that you can be yourself, past mistakes and all.
Healing and blessings to both of you, as well as to your relationship,
eye_of_tiger
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eye_of_tiger
- Site Admin
- Posts: 8490
- Joined: Wed Apr 11, 2007 12:47 am
- Location: Adelaide, South Australia
- Contact:
You are very welcome for the reading, and I hope that at least in some small way it helps you to heal your relationship.
The mistakes of our past generally only continue into the present moment and future, if we allow them to.
Although stopping them from doing so is always much easier said than done.
Wishing you both all the very best,
EoT :) :)
The mistakes of our past generally only continue into the present moment and future, if we allow them to.
Although stopping them from doing so is always much easier said than done.
Wishing you both all the very best,
EoT :) :)
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