Hello . I wanted to know if anyone can help me . I had a huge fall out with a very close soul friend . Its been a month. I was wondering if we will reconcile soon or if we wont. We definitely were very close and it was a misunderstanding which was out of control . I have reached out but have not heard back .
Thank you
Feeling Depressed
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eye_of_tiger
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[Moved here from other posting]
Sorry if posted twice
I had a huge fall out with a very close friend . I wanted to know if we would reconcile or not soon . This is a very close true friend to me and it happened couple of weeks ago and since then I have not been able to function. I am feeling very depressed but if you dont see us reconciling would like to know as well . We were inseparable and it was a misunderstanding that went to far . I have said sorry but I have not heard from them yet though the fault is both of ours .
Thanks for your help
appreciate it a lot
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eye_of_tiger
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A reconciliation is still possible, but you need to increase the probability
Welcome Anu,
There are two problems with your request. The first is that in order to directly read your friend's feelings about the chance of a reconciliation, I would need to give you a third party reading which I am not allowed to do under the current forum rules.
http://mysticboard.org/vi ... hp?t=73424
http://mysticboard.org/vi ... hp?t=83713
Because of the above two issues I am unable to exactly give you the answer which you are looking for (whether there will eventually be a reconciliation between soul friends), so the following reading looks at the question using a completely different approach.
Do you realise that it is not so much the break-up with your best friend which is causing you to feel depressed, but rather what you are telling yourself about the break-up? The reading is not saying for one moment that you should not feel depressed, or that the separation has not been painful to you.
But depression is only one of several options or alternative responses (but often the most common) which you could make to what has happened between you. Have you for example looked at the most likely reasons why your friend is presently avoiding you, and what practical steps have you taken during the last month with the intention to improve this situation by dealing with the real reasons behind this? The reading is picking up on your own feelings of guilt in believing that the break-up could be your fault.
Whether this is true or not.
Guilt has an important teaching function when you are actually guilty of doing something, but a misunderstanding suggests that that you never consciously or deliberately set out to hurt your friend's feelings, so your feelings of guilt are not only undeserved (as everyone makes mistakes), but they are also getting in the way of you doing anything positive in order to be able to fix the problem.
Your needless but still painful feelings of guilt are making you angry at yourself for having not properly communicated your thoughts and ideas to your friend when you had the chance to do so, and anger turned inwards on oneself often leads to depression. You could be basing your beliefs about your own guilt on entirely false assumptions about your friend's true motives for separating from you. In fact according to the reading the probability that you are misreading your friend's real reasons for giving you space are extremely high.
Now if you do nothing and simply wait for your friend to be the first to approach you for a reconciliation, the reading predicts that it is either unlikely to ever happen, or if it does that you could be too old by then to be able to enjoy it. Therefore the only way to significantly increase your chances of reconciliation is for you to take a much more active role in being a big part of the solution, instead of continuing to be a big part of the problem. You need to be fairer and more compassionate towards yourself and above all recognise that what began as an innocent mistake could be turned around into something which will only further strengthen your friendship for each other in the future.
A reconciliation is still possible during the next six months covered by this reading, and it is not too late to begin the healing process if you start NOW.
Once the undeserved guilt for you being human and fallible is out of the way the anger turned inwards upon yourself which is in turn fuelling your depression will lose a lot of its steam, and that the reading assures you is when you are most likely to make incredible forwards progress towards finding a mutually satisfying solution for your predicament. This all sounds to be good advice on paper, but as with most things in life it is often much easier said than done. Also trying too hard can sometimes be as bad as not trying at all, or worse.
Here is where you are probably going to encounter the biggest challenges to healing your broken friendship with this person. You are going to have to for the present forget the problem, and honestly tell your friend how you miss them and in so doing open your heart to them and potentially make yourself more vulnerable to having your feelings hurt more instead of less. Tell him or her what is in your heart. You both made mistakes, BUT IT WAS NOT BOTH YOUR FAULTS. Blaming or fault finding yourself or each other is what is keeping the wound open, so less blame and more shared responsibility to work closely together.
The reading feels that being honest about your feelings towards this person and the separation will largely clear up any source of further misunderstanding about how badly the separation has affected you, and why neither of you wanted to be the first person to break the ice. By making yourself more vulnerable to your friend you will make yourself more human, and the equally vulnerable human part in him or her will respond with more of the same.
Please be prepared for lots of tears of pure joy when you have reached this point while knowing that your friendship is well on the way to being healed, but now much stronger and durable than before. It seems ironic that in making oneself more vulnerable to your friend, and he or she making themselves more vulnerable to you in return, you can make your friendship stronger instead of weaker.
So maybe the claim by spiritual teachers that our perceived vulnerabilities as FHBs (Fallible Human Beings) can potentially be our greatest hidden strengths in disguise is not as ridiculous as it first appears to be on the surface. Your main challenge is to apply the above principles to your only I feel temporarily broken friendship. How effectively and regularly you do this will basically answer your question about the chances of a reconciliation happening between you, within the period of next six months.
Love, Light and Healing,
EoT :smt006 :smt007
There are two problems with your request. The first is that in order to directly read your friend's feelings about the chance of a reconciliation, I would need to give you a third party reading which I am not allowed to do under the current forum rules.
http://mysticboard.org/vi ... hp?t=73424
Secondly while we sometimes pick up on the most likely future if nothing changes in the meantime, the process of predicting the future through these readings can often be unreliable at best, and less than useless at worst.12. Please do not request readings for other people (including family members) or third party readings as this is strictly against Mystic Board’s policies. Instead if you feel that it is safe to and you would like them to ask the person to join Mystic Board themselves. Once they have contributed to the community by posting and introducing themselves, they are much more likely to receive a successful reading in return.
http://mysticboard.org/vi ... hp?t=83713
Because of the above two issues I am unable to exactly give you the answer which you are looking for (whether there will eventually be a reconciliation between soul friends), so the following reading looks at the question using a completely different approach.
Do you realise that it is not so much the break-up with your best friend which is causing you to feel depressed, but rather what you are telling yourself about the break-up? The reading is not saying for one moment that you should not feel depressed, or that the separation has not been painful to you.
But depression is only one of several options or alternative responses (but often the most common) which you could make to what has happened between you. Have you for example looked at the most likely reasons why your friend is presently avoiding you, and what practical steps have you taken during the last month with the intention to improve this situation by dealing with the real reasons behind this? The reading is picking up on your own feelings of guilt in believing that the break-up could be your fault.
Whether this is true or not.
Guilt has an important teaching function when you are actually guilty of doing something, but a misunderstanding suggests that that you never consciously or deliberately set out to hurt your friend's feelings, so your feelings of guilt are not only undeserved (as everyone makes mistakes), but they are also getting in the way of you doing anything positive in order to be able to fix the problem.
Your needless but still painful feelings of guilt are making you angry at yourself for having not properly communicated your thoughts and ideas to your friend when you had the chance to do so, and anger turned inwards on oneself often leads to depression. You could be basing your beliefs about your own guilt on entirely false assumptions about your friend's true motives for separating from you. In fact according to the reading the probability that you are misreading your friend's real reasons for giving you space are extremely high.
Now if you do nothing and simply wait for your friend to be the first to approach you for a reconciliation, the reading predicts that it is either unlikely to ever happen, or if it does that you could be too old by then to be able to enjoy it. Therefore the only way to significantly increase your chances of reconciliation is for you to take a much more active role in being a big part of the solution, instead of continuing to be a big part of the problem. You need to be fairer and more compassionate towards yourself and above all recognise that what began as an innocent mistake could be turned around into something which will only further strengthen your friendship for each other in the future.
A reconciliation is still possible during the next six months covered by this reading, and it is not too late to begin the healing process if you start NOW.
Once the undeserved guilt for you being human and fallible is out of the way the anger turned inwards upon yourself which is in turn fuelling your depression will lose a lot of its steam, and that the reading assures you is when you are most likely to make incredible forwards progress towards finding a mutually satisfying solution for your predicament. This all sounds to be good advice on paper, but as with most things in life it is often much easier said than done. Also trying too hard can sometimes be as bad as not trying at all, or worse.
Here is where you are probably going to encounter the biggest challenges to healing your broken friendship with this person. You are going to have to for the present forget the problem, and honestly tell your friend how you miss them and in so doing open your heart to them and potentially make yourself more vulnerable to having your feelings hurt more instead of less. Tell him or her what is in your heart. You both made mistakes, BUT IT WAS NOT BOTH YOUR FAULTS. Blaming or fault finding yourself or each other is what is keeping the wound open, so less blame and more shared responsibility to work closely together.
The reading feels that being honest about your feelings towards this person and the separation will largely clear up any source of further misunderstanding about how badly the separation has affected you, and why neither of you wanted to be the first person to break the ice. By making yourself more vulnerable to your friend you will make yourself more human, and the equally vulnerable human part in him or her will respond with more of the same.
Please be prepared for lots of tears of pure joy when you have reached this point while knowing that your friendship is well on the way to being healed, but now much stronger and durable than before. It seems ironic that in making oneself more vulnerable to your friend, and he or she making themselves more vulnerable to you in return, you can make your friendship stronger instead of weaker.
So maybe the claim by spiritual teachers that our perceived vulnerabilities as FHBs (Fallible Human Beings) can potentially be our greatest hidden strengths in disguise is not as ridiculous as it first appears to be on the surface. Your main challenge is to apply the above principles to your only I feel temporarily broken friendship. How effectively and regularly you do this will basically answer your question about the chances of a reconciliation happening between you, within the period of next six months.
Love, Light and Healing,
EoT :smt006 :smt007
Hi Thank u so much ... I appreciate it a lot and sorry for posting the wrong question asking about a third party . I basically wanted to know if we would ever reconcile or even if we wont ...ready for the truth ... I all ready did apologize and say Im ready to talk whenever they r ready to with me .... I did not start the misunderstanding but it got spiraled out of control and we both said things we didnt mean ... I am still in shock because I dont know how this happened suddenly like some force breaking us apart ... we shared such an inseparable friendship and shared everything together ....
I have taken that step of apologizing and saying Im here ..... so I hope sometime soon we can heal together ... I am supposed to meet them end of the month but now I dont think I can if they r not ready to respond ...
Thank u so much for taking the time out to reply to me ...it means a lot ... Thank u
Luv & Best Wishes
I have taken that step of apologizing and saying Im here ..... so I hope sometime soon we can heal together ... I am supposed to meet them end of the month but now I dont think I can if they r not ready to respond ...
Thank u so much for taking the time out to reply to me ...it means a lot ... Thank u
Luv & Best Wishes
I really appreciate ur in depth reply to my question ..... I have opened the door to them and told them how I do miss them and Im sorry etc etc ... so its upto them now ... I did it through email and voice mail ....saying we can just talk it out and start over .... I was hoping to see them end of the month ...
Thank u again
I do feel a bit better thanks to your reading ..
Thank u again
I do feel a bit better thanks to your reading ..
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eye_of_tiger
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Anu,
You are very welcome for the reading, which seems to be in total agreement with what you have attempted so far - to reopen the channels of two way communication.
Email and voice mail is only the first small step in the right direction, although emotional honesty is often easier using these methods to prime the healing.
Why does it need to be by the end of any month?
How far are you physically separated by distance?
Reconciliation is the entire process, rather than it only being the desired destination.
It can be a powerful learning experience for the both of you, if you do not take it too personally to heart as being your fault (always easier said than done).
L&L,
EoT :smt049
You are very welcome for the reading, which seems to be in total agreement with what you have attempted so far - to reopen the channels of two way communication.
I measure the usefulness of my readings mainly by how well they make the person feel calmer and able to think more clearly about their problem(s), so thank you for saying that.I do feel a bit better thanks to your reading ..
Is it practical for you to either now or very soon continue the reconciliation process face to face or in person?I did it through email and voice mail .
Email and voice mail is only the first small step in the right direction, although emotional honesty is often easier using these methods to prime the healing.
Why does it need to be by the end of any month?
How far are you physically separated by distance?
Reconciliation is the entire process, rather than it only being the desired destination.
It can be a powerful learning experience for the both of you, if you do not take it too personally to heart as being your fault (always easier said than done).
L&L,
EoT :smt049
Thank u ... U tapped right into the situation ... ur reading was very in tune with whats going on and very accurate so Thanks for that .... we do have some distance between us ...an hour and half by plane ...not a day goes by where we dont talk on the phone and r there for each other in every way ... I am supposed to be visiting for work in their town end of the month ... I know this would be much better face to face but I have never surprised anyone like that or went that far but I do this friendship is worth it so I might just do that . I know they r hurt and going through some other issues in life so adding to that ... I feel horrible thats why I said sorry first ... I hope it works out though might be the craziest thing I have done and hope they receive it well if I get the guts to do that '...I know voicemail text is not enough for our misunderstanding but I did make the first move and they have not responded so that does make me feel a bit bad but its ok maybe meeting in person will help if that works out
Thank u again
Its amazing what u do and how much u help people ...truly u have a gift ..I was a member her elong back and still remember u ...though this is my first reading ...
xx
Thank u again
Its amazing what u do and how much u help people ...truly u have a gift ..I was a member her elong back and still remember u ...though this is my first reading ...
xx
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eye_of_tiger
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- Joined: Wed Apr 11, 2007 12:47 am
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Dear Anu,
So it should have been welcome back?
Which basically explains why while giving you your reading your energies seemed so familiar to me. That nagging feeling that this particular new member was not so new after all.
The reading already confirms that you taking the initiative and making the first approach towards arranging a face to face meeting with your friend is likely to be your best possible option.
However such a meeting must be adequately flagged well ahead of time, and co-arranged by mutual agreement.
Simply turning up where he lives with little if any notice may unintentionally undo much of the progress which you have made up until then towards achieving a reconciliation, while you were still conducting your more than a normal friendship over the phone or internet.
It is above all an issue of trust between you which could potentially be put in danger by what you are planning to do with the very best of intentions, in order for you to find a workable solution in the direction of healing any damage caused by what was clearly an honest misunderstanding by both of you.
Take good care of yourselves and of each other, and thank you with both appreciation and humility for your positive and supportive, heartfelt compliments, with regards to the spiritual labor of love which I do on these forums to help my internet friends.
Namaste,
EoT
So it should have been welcome back?
Which basically explains why while giving you your reading your energies seemed so familiar to me. That nagging feeling that this particular new member was not so new after all.
The reading already confirms that you taking the initiative and making the first approach towards arranging a face to face meeting with your friend is likely to be your best possible option.
However such a meeting must be adequately flagged well ahead of time, and co-arranged by mutual agreement.
Simply turning up where he lives with little if any notice may unintentionally undo much of the progress which you have made up until then towards achieving a reconciliation, while you were still conducting your more than a normal friendship over the phone or internet.
It is above all an issue of trust between you which could potentially be put in danger by what you are planning to do with the very best of intentions, in order for you to find a workable solution in the direction of healing any damage caused by what was clearly an honest misunderstanding by both of you.
Take good care of yourselves and of each other, and thank you with both appreciation and humility for your positive and supportive, heartfelt compliments, with regards to the spiritual labor of love which I do on these forums to help my internet friends.
Namaste,
EoT
Thank u again . I agree if they reach out before then I will let them know otherwise not sure how to go about it ,as it is always planned and thats just better ,I guess I will give it space for now . I dont think I could just show up anyways will have to inform before by phone or etc .
Thanks again for all the great insight & help . It is truly appreciated
Best Wishes
Thanks again for all the great insight & help . It is truly appreciated
Best Wishes
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eye_of_tiger
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Anu, 
You are more than welcome. :smt049
I sincerely hope that everything turns out well for the both of you as true friends are increasingly hard to find in a world where technology is supposed to bring us closer together, but often in reality does the exact opposite.
Try not to make it so long next time before you visit us again as Mystic Board is I believe one of technology's success stories, but without good people like yourself technology is cold and sterile.
Loving regards,
EoT
You are more than welcome. :smt049
I sincerely hope that everything turns out well for the both of you as true friends are increasingly hard to find in a world where technology is supposed to bring us closer together, but often in reality does the exact opposite.
Try not to make it so long next time before you visit us again as Mystic Board is I believe one of technology's success stories, but without good people like yourself technology is cold and sterile.
Loving regards,
EoT
Thank u so much for ur kind words and all the help ... I am so appreciative and u have a fan for life .. I hope it all works out too ...if we were true friends then it will ... giving space sometimes is the best thing ...
I know sorry I was active a while back but I will be now ...this is an amazing site with so much awesome info .....and great helpful people like u here who r like a good friend to come back to ....
Thank u and will be in touch
Luv and Best Wishes
Anu
I know sorry I was active a while back but I will be now ...this is an amazing site with so much awesome info .....and great helpful people like u here who r like a good friend to come back to ....
Thank u and will be in touch
Luv and Best Wishes
Anu
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