My beautiful daughter died

[Lisi]

Hello, my beautiful 20 year old daughter died four weeks ago.  She was a beautiful soul who loved helping people and worked with the disabled.  She was kind and loving.  Does anybody have any messages from her?  Thank you.

[eye_of_tiger]

Hi Lisi,

Welcome to Mystic Board. I only activated your account this morning.

Please accept my sincere condolences on the sad occasion of your significant loss.

We never had the pleasure and privilege of meeting your daughter, but from what you have been telling us about her the world has been left a little darker and poorer because of her passing.

Normally mediumship or spirit readings are not allowed on Mystic Board, and we currently do not have any experienced mediums posting to the boards. But if messages come up during a psychic reading which seem to have a separate personality behind them, then we are allowed to give them.

Grief is a deeply personal experience, and we all grieve for our departed loved ones now in Spirit, in our own different and unique ways.

The important message coming to me from my inner guidance, which may or may not in turn be coming from your daughter (I cannot be sure if this is the case) is that while you need to allow your tears for her to remove or wash away the harmful substances which would otherwise if they had not been removed poison your very soul, take some time out to remember all the happier times which you had together, while she was still with you on Earth.

Regularly get out all our family photographs and pleasant memories of what you meant then and still mean to each other NOW for she is closer to you than the space between two heartbeats, as if in the next room. Draw comfort and extra strength from the love which you shared and still share, even though she no longer has a body that you can see. The love that she feels for for her Mum has only grown stronger now that she is over there, and she can better recognise and appreciate the many personal and other sacrifices which you made, so that your daughter could be the person whom she wanted to be, and live the life that she wanted to live.

Think what she would have done in the same situation if she was still standing beside you, because this has not changed. Then to the best of your abilities (nobody is perfect) do it for the both of you. Not everyone can directly work with the disabled, but there are other ways to help them which are equally valuable and honourable and compassionate.

You also need to take good care of yourself and live your own life as well as you are able. Watch out for the signs which your daughter will send you when she is drawing closer to you, but she will always be there somewhere close by if you need her comfort, continuing her spiritual work on the other side.

This is where your reading ended. I was unable to hold it any longer. However I feel that any messages which were meant to get through, DID GET THROUGH. Thanking you for this opportunity to be a part of your healing, and for a while feeling as though I am part of your family.

Love, Light and Healing to all of you,

EoT  :smt049  :smt049

[Lisi]

Thank you Eye of the Tiger.  What you said resonated.  I will try to keep on going but I know that my life can never be the same without her.  I cry a lot.  I don't understand why I wasn't enough reason for her to stay.  Do you believe suicide can be part of a soul contract?    I feel as though her suicide was pre-determined.

[eye_of_tiger]

When a loved one takes their own life it leaves their family members left behind with many more questions than answers. Plus an overpowering feeling of undeserved guilt that you did not see it coming, or were not able to stop them from doing it. Or that she did not turn to you to find a solution.

No I do not believe that suicide is ever predetermined, or that it is an unavoidable part of a soul's contract. However I do believe that there is something in the personalities of certain people which under especially stressful conditions would make them more likely to end their own life, when compared to the average person.

I do not believe that a suicide victim goes straight to hell for all eternity as a punishment for their actions, as some religions teach.These people are not bad, stupid or weak. Their minds have becone unbalanced for various complex reasons, and they are therefore treated by and taken care of by compassionate spirit doctors as a patient, and not as a criminal.

Some of these people are the most beautiful, intelligent and hardworking of any human being whom you could ever hope to meet, and none of the good they have done in the lives of others will go unrewarded.

It is far too early for you to be able to accept this and just move on with your life, so let the tears flow freely and take good care of yourself until most of your anger and griief has been released.

It was my feeling during the reading that your daughter's skills in taking care of disabled people here will not be wasted once her initial treatment is over. In other words I feel that her love and kindness will be put to use in helping other spirits with "disabilities", that are not associated with a physical body.

Did she also have medical knowledge, as I kept seeing a nurse's uniform with one of those watches that is attached to the bodice with a pin and chain upside down? It does not need to mean that she was actually a nurse. Merely that she may have had medical knowledge, empathy and healing skills which can now be employed on the higher side of life.

Does this help to answer at least some of the many questions which you must still have?

L&L,

EoT

[Lisi]

EoT, my daughter wanted to be a psychiatric nurse. Over a year ago she had applied to do nursing but had failed her entrance exam by one mark.  So she undertook a disability care course and then started working with disabled youth. She really cared about her clients.

This year she was in the process of re-applying to do nursing but had little confidence in her ability to do the essays required. I could tell she was petrified of being rejected again.  She suffered from ADD. She was not hyperactive but had trouble concentrating.  She did have a lot of medical knowledge and was smart.  

I also believe that suicides go to heaven, where they are met with love, compassion and kindness. I do not believe they are punished.  It happened while I was cooking in the kitchen and her friend was sleeping less than a metre from her.  If spirit wanted to stop it--if it wasn't meant to be--something would have happened:  her friend would have woken or not fallen asleep, I would have walked in or called her, a friend would have dropped around.  That is why I wonder whether it was predestined.  

My head knows that it was no one's fault, but as a mother I'm finding it difficult to accept that someone I thought I understood and knew would actually do this.  I don't blame her at all. Nothing she could ever do would make me love her less.  I just really miss her -- to talk to, to cuddle, to kiss good morning and good night, to spend time with.  

Thank you for listening and reaching out to me. xx

[eye_of_tiger]

Spirit are not allowed to intervene. Otherwise we would not have free will to be able to consciously choose what course our lives will take. But I do think that in her unbalanced state of mind your daughter unconsciously arranged that it would happen, without any of you being there to stop her. She thought that she was protecting you from seeing her do it, but the sad legacy which she left behind her was unintentionally much worse.

So many healers in their lives have significant medical challenges of their own to deal with. Healer, first heal thyself? It is thought that this is to teach them compassion and empathy for the suffering of others. Once again this is not intended as a form of punishment, but rather it is a learning opportunity. Very hard and difficult lessons indeed, both for the person him or herself, as well as their family and friends.

It is a tribute to your daughter and a credit to you as her mother that she had enough confidence with her ADD to sit for the nursing exams, even though she got within one mark of a passing grade. She could have easily given up but she redirected her efforts into a slightly different direction in helping the disabled. A lesser person would have concluded that she was never meant to nurse and care for people who were sick in their minds or disabled, but she and you as her support team would simply not give up on her dream.

I thank you for your complete and honest feedback. You are welcome for the reading. I only wish that I could do more for you in the limited space and time and energy which I have available to me for doing my spiritual work over the internet.

I live on a disability support pension myself. I will not go into any further details here, but let me simply say to you that chronic illness, disability and life long anxiety and depression as well as low self confidence are well known to me as well as to our adult son, and that we should probably leave it at that.

Love, Light and Healing,

EoT

[Lisi]

Thank you EoT.  You have been very kind and have helped me.  I am sorry for your circumstances. I wish you well.

[eye_of_tiger]

Lisi,

Thank you for being so understanding. For it was understanding and not sympathy which was the reason for me telling you this.

I only wish that we had met under more pleasant circumstances, but life has a way of unfolding in completely unpredictable directions, and hopefully some good can eventually come out of this personal tragedy for all people affected.

Loving regards,

EoT  

[tari123]

So sorry to hear x