3 Year new boss, 28 year worker

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spring88
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Joined: Mon Jul 03, 2006 12:46 am

3 Year new boss, 28 year worker

Post by spring88 » Fri Jul 08, 2016 7:53 pm

Hi all, I am an experience 28 year teacher and love teaching however in the last 3 years we have had a rude, demeaning, unbelievable negative boss.  I can't change job locations and actually love me location.
What or how can I do?  I can only pray she get promoted and move on.
All thanks.

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eye_of_tiger
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Post by eye_of_tiger » Sat Jul 09, 2016 3:25 am

Spring,

Is  your boss  rude, demeaning and unbelievably negative towards everyone who works under her, or does she specifically have a problem with and keep picking on you?

What is her staff position?

Senior teacher, deputy head or headmistress?

Thanks,

Brian  Image

spring88
Posts: 58
Joined: Mon Jul 03, 2006 12:46 am

Hi eye_of_tiger

Post by spring88 » Sun Jul 10, 2016 3:56 pm

Hi and greeting eye_of_tiger, no she is not that way with everyone, apparently she wants to install or replace the staff with her previous colleagues, she has now 3 of her former school staff friends.
I am 52 with severe arthritis, she moved me from one grade to another, my parents are wonderful, I never go to her about spirited students or problems,
I would love to teach the grade I was teaching till she put me in another, stating my position was eleminated and she put a former same grade teacher in it.  I love the school and the students and unable to leave my job, school starts back in August.  My boss's name is Lila.  She gave me a basic/proficient evaluation, in the past I had advance/and above.  Many thanks for your help.

spring88

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eye_of_tiger
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Post by eye_of_tiger » Mon Jul 11, 2016 12:50 am

I never go to her about spirited students or problems,
Why would you go to her with your problems when she is clearly looking for any excuse to make you redundant, and is therefore not in the slightest bit interested in helping you to find any solutions, or help you to become a better teacher?

Unfortunately power can corrupt and as Lila has been placed in a position of authority over you and you say that you cannot and do not want to move to another school, you have little choice other than to try to keep your head down and accept that short of her being transferred to another school this situation is highly unlikely to improve any time soon.

Lila is obviously repopulating your current workplace with former workmates who will follow her lead and do whatever she wants them to do without question, which is why she sees you as a threat to her plan.

If she is that sort of manipulative person then I would not put it past her to use both your age as well as your severe arthritis (which must make your job incredibly more difficult than it would otherwise be) against you.

If she attempts to use your age and arthritis as a weapon against you, do you have age or disability discrimination laws where you live, and can the teacher's union be of any assistance to you in furthering and asserting your legal rights to be able to do the job which you love and are so good at, without Lila being able to bully you after years of loyal and caring service to your students as well as the school system itself?

I must sincerely apologise if the above sounds overly negative and that so far your reading has mainly talked about Lila and the situation she has placed you in, but I believe that in order to solve a problem one must be completely honest about and clearly identify what that problem is, and there is no doubt in my mind where or in whom the problem lies. I do not know why Lila has become the way that she is, but whatever the reason is this is not an excuse for her rude, demeaning and unbelievably negative behaviour towards you.

So if you cannot change the situation you are in, perhaps you can change the meaning which you associate with what Lila is doing. This is not suddenly or magically going to make her change overnight, but the only alternative option is for you to show your displeasure by doing anything to sabotage her plans which would be guaranteed to make her even more determined to terminate your position on the staff.

Your boss already has control of enough levers without you unwittingly giving her any more ammunition to use against you. And the reading recognizes that you are a person of high moral principles, and that therefore any chance that your actions could indirectly deprive or harm your students makes getting your revenge upon her entirely off limits.

The reading is not suggesting that you should not stand up at times for your own rights with Lila (perhaps with the help of your union and the law), but it is saying that you should avoid pushing your luck so far that you could give her any further power to terminate you.

The great Mahatma Gandhi called this approach passive resistance, meaning that instead of using violent or illegal or unethical means to have your rights respected by your opponent/your competition/your boss you should do nothing which could give them any further ability to manipulate you, or make you so angry that you might do something impulsive that you would quickly come to regret doing, but may not be able to easily reverse (if at all).

Instead continue to be true to yourself, your profession and your students. Do the best which you are able to, in spite of and while still being in this uncomfortable and stressful situation. Accepting your situation as it is and not as you would like it to be does not mean giving up or betraying your moral principles, or bringing yourself down to Lila's level.

But it is the reading feels the only effective way of you being allowed to continue to do the job which you were always meant to do, but to at the same time preserve and protect your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health.  You may be unable to change or have any control over the situation which you currently find yourself in, but you do have some level of control over your attitudes or the meanings which you associate with Lila's behaviour.

While it must be incredibly difficult for you to do this and there will always continue to be days when it all gets too much for you, it is your own health on all levels plus the welfare and future of your very fortunate to have you as their teacher students which must always be given the highest priority over any conflicts or problems between Lila and yourself.

As a retired school teacher myself, I greatly admire and respect your professionalism and strength in the face of such adversity. And as someone who also has his own long term health issues I find your 28 years of teaching with severe arthritis inspiring.

I am sure that the rest of the staff (minus Lila and her puppets), the students whom you have had over all those years and their parents must feel the same admiration and appreciation, with you having given over half of your entire lifetime and the highest qualities of character in yourself to the noble profession to which you were called.
Time spent teaching is never lost.
Anonymous

L&L,

Brian Image

spring88
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Joined: Mon Jul 03, 2006 12:46 am

Very sage advice.

Post by spring88 » Tue Jul 12, 2016 1:26 am

My many Thanks, the joy of my students is far greater than a difficult negative principal.  However to be honest I hope she is moved to another school.
I will follow your words of wisdom and again thanks.
Spring

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Post by eye_of_tiger » Wed Jul 13, 2016 1:08 am

Spring,

You are very welcome for the reading.
However to be honest I hope she is moved to another school.
So do I.

Sooner rather than later would be nice.

But since prayer should never be used to wish harm upon another person (including people like Lila), pray instead that some other school will soon be blessed with her presence, and that they will all be very happy ever after as a result.

Just joking!

Brian  :smt002  :smt002  :smt005

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