Relationship Clarification from Cedars

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Marsy
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Relationship Clarification from Cedars

Post by Marsy » Sun Dec 14, 2014 3:47 am

Hi! I would like a clarification reading in regards to my current relationship. At times it's really great but then things happen and I get confused as to whether or not to keep the relationship going or leave.

Thank you!

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Post by eye_of_tiger » Sun Dec 14, 2014 10:53 pm

3. Asking for a specific reader or a specific kind of reading will limit the possibilities of receiving a prompt response. Sometimes a reader may be too busy and so others will not respond to your request.
http://mysticboard.org/vi ... hp?t=68017

EoT

Marsy
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Post by Marsy » Mon Dec 15, 2014 1:52 am

EOT I'm aware of the rules and have no issue waiting for cedars to become available.

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Post by eye_of_tiger » Mon Dec 15, 2014 9:52 pm

Marsy,

Message read and understood.

A reading from our very good friend and respected colleague Cedars has always been, and will always be worth waiting for.

Blessings to the both of you,

EoT :smt038

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cedars
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Post by cedars » Tue Dec 16, 2014 11:25 am

Dear Marsy,

It will be a privilege giving you a reading. I will try and post it by the end of today UK time.
Blessings to you my friend.
Last edited by cedars on Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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cedars
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Post by cedars » Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:47 pm

Dear Marsy

Your relationship situation is not a totally unfamiliar situation. I do feel for you and I understand that situation too well.
I like the way you have formed your question too. It is not a point blank predictive reading you are requesting and I do appreciate your approach towards tarot and such readings in general.

I will format my own spread and let us see how we get on with it.

I am using the Rider Waite deck.

In its current state, what does this relationship mean and represent to Marsy?
The Lovers and Ten of Cups.


Immediately as I picked these cards, I got the feeling that despite the highly attractive potential of these two cards, that it might mean a wishful thinking rather than the actual state of the relationship. While the Lovers as a Major Arcana card stands for that idealistic Love that we all crave for in our life, but I am getting the feeling that it may also refer to choices to be made. An element of temptation to go this way or the other in one’s choice, there might be the potential of attaining the ultimate in a family bliss indicated by the Ten of Cups.
For you, this relationship would like to be love everlasting in its strongest basis – both emotionally and spiritually – hence leading to a perfect material/physical union as the Ten of Cups which in fact is the number Ten attainment of the suit of Cups. It is the final stage of the journey of that suit which is attainment and emotional bliss.
Please note: I am not getting the feeling that this is so at the moment; it is what this relationship means to you and this is what you would like to see happen.

What are the high points of this relationship for Marsy?
Four of Wands and Six of Wands.

Both of these cards are from the element of Fire and they are both from the Minor Arcana referring to the mundane and the practical side of our life. Fire element indicates passion, excitement, creativity and the word ego comes to the tip of my fingers…
There is fun in this relationship indicated by the Four of Wands. There is an element of togetherness and celebrations of things achieved in unison. This card indicates the results of the hard work put in and, therefore, celebrating its positive outcome. It could be something you have both worked towards and once achieved, you have no problems acknowledging it and celebrating it together and/or with family and friends.
I am getting mixed feelings with the Six of Wands however I look at it. This card is all about victory, albeit not a lasting one, but it is victory and admiration by one’s peers. Victory over what in your relationship, I ask myself? Do you feel victorious over things achieved together, or do you get that feeling of having won over a situation (or come out of it victorious) on your own, by your very own means and efforts? If this means that all the achievements in this relationship are attributed to one person’s efforts - in this case yours only - then this victory as the six of Wands indicates is not a long lasting one.
This situation could indeed be a High point in this relationship for you and it gives an enormous ego boost when you find yourself as the ‘solver’ of issues and the one who brings solutions to situations and finds answers….. But…. in hindsight, is it a high point?

What are the Low points of this relationship for Marsy?
Knight of Cups. King of Wands.

Okayy!! We have two court cards here and this makes things a bit complex. We shall look at these cards first as people in your life and then look at them again as personality traits relevant to their suits.
The immediate feeling I am getting from the Knight of Cups (water sign: Cancer, Scorpio or Pisces) is someone, within the same age range as yours give or take a few years, who is overly emotional and sentimental to the extent that those qualities can be suffocating at times. You feel as though you are being drowned in them and can’t breathe any more. This said person, besides being too emotional, can also go through various mood swings and you don’t know how to handle it and when/if it is going to have a detrimental impact on your relationship. This, am afraid, is the nature of the water sign people and, indeed, they can be overbearing with their mood swings, emotional highs (and lows I might add) and for an Earth sign such as yours, things can become a bit ‘muddy’ to say the least. But it doesn’t mean emotions are bad; feeling things is a good quality, but the extent these feelings are dragged on and unnecessarily become overbearing to their surroundings.
On the other hand, we have a total opposite to this Knight in the person of the King of Wands. Now, this is a mature man, who belongs to the Fire sign (Leo, Aries, Sagittarius) who can be charming, passionate, creative, knows how to enjoy life and how to charm people around him. He is older than our Knight of Cups and he could be a professional, family member or even a mutual friend. Might I say he could even be someone distracting you? I feel the Low that this person brings to the relationship is by virtue of being the total opposite of the Knight of Cups. Whilst the latter may be overbearing with his sentimentality and his excessive romantic gestures, the King of Cups, does them so naturally and without the display of those overly emotional tendencies. Might you be comparing this King to the Knight and wishing he (the knight) would be a bit like him?

How can the above two scenarios be blended for a satisfactory outcome – be it negative or positive?
Three of Wands. Four of Swords. Queen of Pentacles.

Before I go ahead, I would like to clarify why I chose the outcome as being either negative or positive. It could be that a negative outcome to this situation could in fact be a positive one, as not all negatives are truly negative. I wanted to clarify this before going ahead with this section of the spread.
If we could blend the above two scenarios of the Highs and Lows of this relationship and find an outcome that will be good to both of you (mind my comparison of negatives and positives here) then this part of the reading is showing me some contrasts and yet similarities with the inclusion of a court card once again.
The Three of Wands shows a man standing on top of a hill, looking ahead and patiently waiting for the outcome of the choices he made with the Two of Wands (not part of this reading). This is the man who is the leader, the starter of a venture, the one who made choices and is now waiting for his choices to pay off. He does not know what the result of those choices will be, hence his current stature – still as a leader of his own decisions – on the top of the mountain looking ahead at the seas waiting for the ships to come home. Very symbolic I agree, but not so if you have made a choice the way the Lovers card indicated at the beginning of this reading.
It seems to me there is a great deal of waiting rather than blending here with the above two scenarios. Granted, not all scenarios can be blended together; sometimes we need to make decisions and choices and in order for that to come into fruition, there will be a period of wait-and-see. This is also indicated by the Four of Swords where we see a man lying low, in a retreat mode, waiting for things to sort themselves out. This is not the lazy or the easy way out, but this is time to give oneself the opportunity to let things ‘brew’ in one’s mind; to let go for a while and see how the mind sees things. The time will come when the sleep mode will change to one of action, but until then I feel there will be some waiting to be done.
Can you actually blend the above two scenarios? Do you want to? Can you take these hot and cold currents coming from the other party in this relationship? Have you already made a decision in your own mind and are waiting to see its results (Three of Wands/Four of Swords)?
And who is this lady – the Queen of Pentacles? She is an Earth sign (Taurus, Virgo Capricorn). She is a mother figure, one who has a good head on her shoulders; kind and benevolent and financially secure. She would be willing to help both financially and spiritually when asked. Would the advice of this lady make you see the light on how to find a solution to this situation whether by bringing you together or going your separate ways?  

Dear Marsy, I see there is something to change in this relationship. As you have been the leading power in this union, I feel the weight of the decision will fall upon you. The cards will not make that decision for you am afraid,  and I would not like to give a reading on that basis. But I feel you will make the right decision based on the second and the third criteria of this spread.

I hope the insights given in this reading made sense to you and I will be happy to hear from you.

Best wishes and many blessings.

Marsy
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Joined: Sat Mar 31, 2012 7:26 am

Post by Marsy » Wed Dec 17, 2014 12:57 am

Thank you so much for taking the time to do a reading for me! It's greatly appreciated! Okay I understand the reading and it's spot on and I want to give you a little background info, answers to your questions, therefor you can put any additional pieces to the puzzle together.

He is a Scorpio/Knight of Cups and is exactly how you described and his feelings toward me are very intense and complex but I don't mind as I appreciate having someone who can go that deep emotionally as I haven't experienced that from guys in the past, so although I can feel it's suffocating at times, I'm okay with it. I'm actually surprised the King of Wands showed up and it just shows how amazing Tarot is at capturing everything in a situation but anyway I'm not really interested in the King of Wands per say, however I do view him as a breath of fresh air because I can interact with him and it's not deep and serious, I'm relaxed but I have no romantic interest in him but he is very much a distraction.

The Knight of Cups and I are co-workers and that's where the obstacle in our relationship is from. People at work were trying to cause friction between us but we both prevailed and stuck together however that victory is short lived because ultimately we cannot have an open relationship working together. So I have made the decision to leave so we can stay together which will be the true lasting victory because that is the only way our relationship can reach it's full potential and I'm okay with making that choice because I was already getting to an unhappy place before our work relationship drama started. The events just confirmed that I need to move on and that job certainly is not worth sacrificing my relationship for.

As for the outcome, it is him waiting on me to quit the job and save our relationship. He's put in the work of giving me his heart and making sacrifices for me but now he's waiting to see if I'm going to do the same for him. And as I've stated before, I've already decided to quit so our relationship can move forward to the 10 of Cups.

The Queen of Pents is my best friend and I know she's willing to help in any way she can, she's been my rock through all the drama.
Anything else you'd like to add after getting the background info? Also thanks again for the reading!

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cedars
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Post by cedars » Wed Dec 17, 2014 9:08 am

Thank you for your feedback and the background info about your situation. Once a reading has been done, I cannot go and re-invent the whole reading, but I am able to make some clarifications on certain aspects which you may have misunderstood. Any other comments I make after that will be my own personal opinion and I am still two-minded if I should make those comments as I start writing this to you…..

The last bit of the reading with the Three of Wands and the Four of Swords refer to you and not to him. This is your reading and not his. If anyone who has made a choice and has retreated thinking things over and waiting, is you and not him. Even though the characters on the cards are portrayed by male figures, the gender factor is irrelevant. I believe even though you in your own mind have made the choice to leave your job in order to save the relationship, you are the one who is taking some time out and contemplating over things. It is not him waiting for you to leave your job. Please be aware of this subtle difference in the way you have interpreted the last section of the reading.

The question you need to ask yourself – in the deepest part of your soul – is do you really want to leave this job for the sake of the relationship? There is absolutely nothing wrong whatsoever asking this question to yourself or even questioning and re-examining the choice/decision you have made so far. If you have any doubts about your choice, then that is why you are subconsciously taking some time out to see how you will feel or react after a while. This in no way compromises your integrity towards this relationship or even yourself; it is your right to have doubts and second thoughts about an idea or a choice you have made within your own mind. If the Queen of Pentacles is your rock, perhaps you could confide in her about your doubts and apprehensions…..

You say it is him waiting on me to quit the job and save our relationship. He's put in the work of giving me his heart and making sacrifices for me but now he's waiting to see if I'm going to do the same for him.

Sweetheart, it is no sacrifice that he has given his heart to you. When you love someone giving your heart is not a sacrifice; it is how love works. Where does your heart come into this? Don’t you love him? If you do, then haven’t you sacrificed as well by giving your heart to him? Why is his heart of such a higher value than yours? Why do I see here a case of one has done more than the other in this relationship? True, I don’t know what other ‘sacrifices’ he has made towards this relationship, but do not ever consider his love for you as ‘sacrifice’ .  When we love someone, we don’t do any sacrifices. That is what LOVE is.  Why is the onus on you to save this relationship by quitting your job, I do not understand?

Your reading request said…: At times it's really great but then things happen and I get confused as to whether or not to keep the relationship going or leave.   I feel by this that the highs and the lows of this relationship go further beyond you being co-workers in the same environment.
Please give yourself time to think things over about the relationship itself and not about whether you should leave this job or not. It is not a competition as to who offers the biggest sacrifice here.

Best wishes.

Marsy
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Joined: Sat Mar 31, 2012 7:26 am

Post by Marsy » Mon Jan 12, 2015 8:28 pm

Hi Cedars!

I wanted to update you as I feel I replied too quickly to the reading and should have let some time pass so I could see what events would take place in regards to the reading. Now that time has passed, events have certainly transpired and I understand the reading a lot better now.

It is correct that it is me who is in waiting mode and at this point it's not about me leaving me job as I've already made the decision to do that because of my own unhappiness in my position. However the choice is if I want to continue with the relationship with the Knight of Cups because as I stated some events have taken place since the reading that has made me stop and really think about whether or not it's in my best interest to move forward with him, which is exactly what the cards were telling you/me that would happen.

You are correct that giving ones heart is not a sacrifice, it was just that a lot has happened and I was just trying to explain how appreciative I was of his efforts. However as you stated when you love someone, those are things that happen naturally and we don't owe each other anything for our investments. It's merely what love/relationships are all about and as for as him or I being the one to leave the company, it's easier for me because he is under contract where as I am not plus as I stated before I haven't been happy in my position for awhile. So now I realize the choice really isn't about me leaving my job to save our relationship but whether or not the Knight of Cups is a man I want to be in a relationship with period.

So yes I'm in retreat, wait and see mode right now and just really taking time to think things over. I've already got a pending offer at another job however do I want to continue on with the Knight of Cups is the decision I need to make...

I'll update you and let you know how things turn out.

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cedars
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Post by cedars » Mon Jan 12, 2015 9:42 pm

......however do I want to continue on with the Knight of Cups is the decision I need to make...
That is exactly what I felt when I did the reading to you and I thought perhaps I should let you come to that conclusion yourself, as I thought you hadn't or didn't want to see it that way... As difficult as these situations are, you have been in touch with your inner soul and know the issue(s) very well.

On such decisions no one can advise you what to do.... but am wondering if the Queen of Pentacles is someone who can help or if she is going to be of help to you in your career path......??

You have assessed the reading and the current situation quite well, Marsy, and I thank you for getting back with further clarification.

I do hope things go well for you (and for him) in the best possible way for you two whichever direction you each decide to go.

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