Hi Cedars ...

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Minnie6000
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Hi Cedars ...

Post by Minnie6000 » Fri Jun 26, 2015 1:27 pm

greetings

Had a look @ the info in the forum! Was wondering if I could have a reading, if you are cool with that ?

I have just started seeing someone and I kind of really like him - but I'm not sure if I should just leave it, as he is way younger than me,lives abroad and also I don't want to get hurt. I was just wondering if you could look into the upcoming few /couple (etc) months in this love life topic for me.

Thank you!!!!!!

Min

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cedars
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Post by cedars » Sat Jun 27, 2015 3:23 pm

Hi Minnie

I can’t help wondering about the age issue that you have mentioned… You yourself are 26 years old. Now, how old is this guy?  19? 20?
I have my own opinions about long-distance relationships (and from what it sounds, it looks like a cyber-distance relationship). But let us leave my personal opinion aside and get on with the cards.
The time span for any reading takes into consideration the next six months. And, whilst I am not intentionally doing a reading where it would say you should do this or that – that is totally up to you and your instincts, but let us see what are the energies around this relationship for the next six months.

What are the energies surrounding this relationship from now and for the next six months?

You at the present and your current gut feeling about this:
Knight of Swords.

The first word that came to me as soon as I picked this card was – Whirlwind.
The Knight of Swords is an Air sign (Libra, Gemini or Aquarius) and true to its sign, he is all words,  instability, blowing here and there, galloping from this situation to that, makes promises and does not necessarily keep them. And, when he does keep his promise, you are not sure if he will continue doing so in the future.
If this is not relevant to the person you are dealing with – Court cards generally indicate people in our life and their personality traits  – this could also mean you yourself experiencing or currently possessing the qualities of this knight in question.
Are your instincts telling you, perhaps, that this is a passing – a whirlwind – affair which has no substance? The way our Knight is presented on the card is he is virtually flying off on his horse to an unknown destination – wherever the wind takes him.

What are the energies surrounding this situation for the foreseeable future – six months?
Eight of Swords:Another card from the Air element.
This is a debilitating situation whereby you don’t know where to go and what to do. You cant see the future, you cant take any action, as you are surrounded by eight swords all mainly behind you. The situation is volatile as you stand on a stream of water and your arms tied around your waist, you either don’t want to see what is ahead of you  or simply don’t see it. It is almost a stagnant situation and I am getting the feeling that you do not wish to open your eyes and see the way ahead of you. Although your hands are tied and you are blindfolded, but there are no obstacle swords in front of you. There is a gate in front of you and all you have to do is take the blindfold and see what is in front of you. This is very similar to the Two of Swords whereby the person involved can choose their path by simply removing the blindfold. But in this case, it is the whole situation that has made you ‘blind’ metaphorically and you find yourself actually trapped in it. This is the state of affairs that this relationship will present itself to you – no purpose, no aim and a sense of debilitating uncertainty.

Nine of Swords. Wow.. the next Sword card after the Eight.
Things are not getting any better. In fact, this situation is almost giving you nightmarish thoughts and literally keeping you awake all night. From debilitating uncertainty to anguish and fear that had it not been for the Eight of Swords, I would have said this is all on your mind and you may be exaggerating things all beyond proportion.

Page of Wands; a shift from Air to Fire sign.
Pages are court cards too, but they are the younger brothers (or sisters) of the Knights. The energy of a Page – in this case the Page of Wands – is a new energy, a message perhaps from a person of the fire sign. But this is quite a young person, may be in his late teens. If this is not a young person, he could be an adult but with the energy of a young person who will bring a new energy to the way you see things and give you inspiration and trigger your imagination as to your dual situation described above.

Six of Cups: Okay, now we are moving away from Swords and getting into Cups – water sign.
The Six of Cups is the card of nostalgia and remembering the past. Could the above Page of Wands be someone from the past who is awakening such feelings of nostalgia within you? You may be feeling nostalgic about an old friend, a fling or a flame in the past who may lighten the burden of the swords mentioned above.

As we are looking for the future, I feel this Page of Wands is someone coming into your life or his influence playing a part in your life for the months to come.

Advice from the Tarot:
The Hanged Man. This card flew off as I was shuffling and, therefore, its message, being a Major Arcana card is vital.
This is the card of waiting and assessing the situation. The man in this card is turned upside down and has a halo around his head. He is turning things upside down, inside out in his mind and re-evaluating a situation to arrive to his own conclusion. It is as though a self-inflicted withdrawal from the world to find enlightenment and harmony in his thoughts. Some call this the ‘sacrifice’ card and if you wish to take on that word, perhaps you are sacrificing your movements, any future actions and conclusions to a time spent on your own to see things in a clearer mind and, in a way, with a certain divine inspiration.
Two of Swords:
Not too different from the Eight of Swords , but quite different in m any ways. We see here a lady – blindfolded again – sitting on a stone bench with the sea behind her and she is holding two swords upright crossed against her chest. This card is telling you to stop humming and huffing , stop wondering what if, as the choice is yours and yours only to take off that blindfold (your hands are free) and see what the facts are make a choice accordingly.

I hope the insights in this reading did resonate with you and I will be happy to hear from you.

Blessings.
Last edited by cedars on Fri Apr 08, 2016 10:20 am, edited 1 time in total.

Minnie6000
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Post by Minnie6000 » Sat Jun 27, 2015 8:47 pm

Cedars

How so very kind of you to respond, and so quickly also :) :)

Thank you for your time spent carrying out the reading. Yes, I am a little overwhelmed by what I have read. The gentleman in question is in his very early 20s. Yes, you are right, we met online , but for some reason, it feels like we know each other well/have some sort of 'connection' (we have both made mention of this).
HOWEVER

I haven't have a great track record with reliable guys. I don't really know what he (truly) wants/what his long term intentions are (if any). It is/certainly has been a whirlwind and very intense, my and his engagement and seeming? connection.

I am anxious around stuff with men. This is the first guy that I have met in many years that I have liked everything about him. I am generally quite a nervy personality, and am petrified of rejection. The facts of the matter seem to indicate that there is no point continuing to engage with him as he is very young, not local and also I assume young guys just want to 'sow the seed' for want of better phrase. But yet I love chatting with him etc. he keeps asking me to visit and also talks of us hanging out when he visits London (it was pre booked, before het met me), but I don't know if my fears around it for some reason feeling unstable, are my head raising red flags to me, to tell me to just 'get real' and walk from it, and avoid getting hurt, or if it is paranoia. Hence the sleepless nights. I know that probably sounds 'extreme' to people that are not anxious personalities. So, as it stands. I have no idea how to move forward. I am more anxious when engaging with him (waiting to hear after we stop chatting, wondering if he has disappeared for good/met someone more local etc), than I am when not. Therefore, I feel I should just cut off contact with him, to just enable me to go back to not over thinking about stuff, but yet then id miss him/be disappointed at feeling 'what would have been'. So, I don't know really , how to move forward.

Anyway, thanks again for the reading. Those are my thoughts and literal facts about the situation.

Best Regards

M

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cedars
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Post by cedars » Sun Jun 28, 2015 5:03 pm

Hello Minnie

These comments following your feedback do not form part or an extension of your reading. In other words, this is not a further reading but simply my opinion and if my point of view can be of any use to help you in your situation.

You could have a few choices here, but all depends on how you wish to proceed:

Do not base your misfortunes with other men to every new situation or a man that come along in your life. Whilst on one hand it is good to be cautious and be self-preserving, but on the other hand if this person is coming to London by default and regardless of your recent cyber connection, what would you have to lose if you met him a few times?
If you are confident of yourself not to let him 'sow his seeds' or even if you yourself felt inclined to go that far  within the realms of safety and caution, would you feel too bad if in the end it turned out that he was only looking for a one-night stand or that it was an infatuation of some sort - on both or one side? Risky, I agree, but is it worth taking the risk to find out?

The choice is yours on the above.

However, yes, he is a bit younger than you but at 20 he is considered to be an adult.

In order to put you out of your misery of the sleepless nights, if you met him in London purely on a platonic and friendly basis, is there very much wrong with that? Is there much to lose there if you decide that you will not cross the line and remain platonic?

I am getting the feeling that this sense of wanting to hear from him and missing him and wishing that you could chat again and again, is merely on your part (and not reciprocated by him?), are you thinking that those feelings may lead you to make a mistake and fall flat on your face?

Until such time that you meet up in London, would it be so bad to take the role of the Hanged Man and do some soul searching? If during this period you wish to stop contact with him, would that not be a testing period for him and see how he would react to your go-slow and withdrawing stance?  

I am not saying that you start playing mind games or act difficult-to-get, but if you wish to take some time out and view things from a distance without perhaps writing him off completely, would you be able to cope with that?

These are my thoughts. Feel free to share yours privately or in public :)

Hugs.

Minnie6000
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Joined: Fri Jun 26, 2015 1:05 pm

Post by Minnie6000 » Mon Jun 29, 2015 3:01 pm

Hi Cedars

Thank you for your response/thoughts. I have posted in the forum, just as my understanding of the site is that the users of the site use the conversations such as ours to better understand/educated themselves in regards to Tarot etc, and thus perhaps I can make a contribution in me way to yourself and all, in order to thank you all for accepting me warmly into the community and your time etc.

1)
I was wondering if I could firstly ask after the immediately comment you made in your first response - ie. about your personal view on long distance relationships?

2)

Secondly, if your comment:  "I am getting the feeling that this sense of wanting to hear from him and missing him and wishing that you could chat again and again, is merely on your part (and not reciprocated by him?), are you thinking that those feelings may lead you to make a mistake and fall flat on your face? " is based on the feeling that you got from /during making the tarot reading or in general from  writing style/summary of the situation (ie in reference to my last post).

To answer your questions - the situation and my feelings are a blur. I do really like him , but I have no idea what his motives/intentions are towards me. Yes, I do want to keep hearing from him, but also not sure what the point is given he is not solvent (i.e cant realistically visit often, nomadic , very young and also is a fan of the pleasures of the flesh. I am not good at being 'casual' in any sense of the word. I don't know how to handle the situation in a 'healthy' way. I can't imagine meeting up with him with a 'neutral' mindset, given I am a very anxious personality (always scared of rejection, even when i'm not interested in the person). I am trying to help myself via self help books, but my 'knee jerk' emotions (given my past and insecurities) results in my 'auto piloting' into obsession around him, if he will contact, over analysing the matter. Even my own motives towards him are sort of 'hazy' in my head i.e I flirt a lot with him and am suggestive. I don't know what I want from him , if I am also interested in short term physical stuff or more, or what is my insecurities reacting or what. In some ways, I wish he would just disappear, then I could just leave it in my head and move on.

All I can do is read self help books to try and make sense of this all in my head somehow. I mean for example, I had actually tried you mentioned of not responding to him for awhile. he was casual about contact, didn't really chase and I for awhile was ok with it, then panicked then thrillled to hear from him. If it were any one else writing this , and I read the above - id tell them to get  grip to be honest.

Anyway, I will just read my pray/read my self help books and see where they lead me. Any advice, would be most welcome though, if I am not at this stage imposing /being overdemanding.

thanks again

M

Minnie6000
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Post by Minnie6000 » Mon Jun 29, 2015 3:07 pm

Apologies all , for the typing and grammatical errors within my post above. I hope that that didn't make the text hard to read. I am not a good speed typer - apologies!

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cedars
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Post by cedars » Wed Jul 01, 2015 6:48 am

Minnie

It is fine posting in the forum.
No, there was nothing wrong with your punctuation or grammar :)

The 'feeling' I got was when I was writing my thoughts to you and not during the reading.

Why don't I believe in long-distance relationships? Simple. A relationship - as the word suggests - should be the sharing of two people their life..... In that, how much of that can be done when there is a distance between them? I am not talking about two people living in the same city but not necessarily living together, although that can present some challenges too. But being in two different countries and relying on the phone, especially at times when you needed him or her next to you or wanted to share something that required more than a phone call, will get to you after a period of time..... Enough said?

You are well aware of your obsession towards this guy - for that I salute you. But, you know it is an obsession and possibly not entirely reciprocated by this youngster. So, where do you draw the line? When do you say to yourself enough is enough ? Added to that the blur of your feelings in this situation makes me wonder if you should stay on this path or move on - on your own.

I did not mean any offence when I hinted that if casual/passive 'fun' will get this guy out of your system and if that is both what you want (I know you dont want that), then as two adults you are not doing anything wrong.  There are different views on this of course but we shall not get into them, as your view is the most important one here.

You dont seem to be in a good place as your reading revealed.

What do you do now?
Cut the cord and move on?
Tell him what you think/feel about this situation and see how he reacts? (you probably know how he will respond).

Or, meet him and face the beast by the horns?

I know what I would do, but in this case, the decision is yours.

Hugs.

Minnie6000
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Jun 26, 2015 1:05 pm

Post by Minnie6000 » Thu Jul 09, 2015 12:28 am

Hi cedars

I'm sorry to bother you again. I am literally sick of sleeplessness nights over this topic and need to find a way to just shut my mind down on this.

In reference to your last message above, do you mind me asking what you would do?

I think realistically, if I was to read the above and review it as with someone else being advised, I'd just tell them to walk from it, vs face future heartache. For whatever reason, I find it hard to do this.

Perhaps if I heard some 'home truths' it would help me just detach from the situation. For example , you made the comment  "or that it was an infatuation of some sort - on both or one side?".
Were you being polite in inserting 'both'? ie more politely stating that meeting with him would result in my infatuation?

This is the final question I will ask - as I said, I have just written as I just want to find a way to just close the matter down in my mind, and am hoping your wisdom and astute advice (to reference the readings I have reviewed on this forum) might help me to finda  way to move on with my life and find the right path.

But honestly don't worry if i'm asking too much

Many Thanks

M

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cedars
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Post by cedars » Thu Jul 09, 2015 5:25 pm

Hi Minnie,

What can I say?

The advice given in your reading is quite apt in your situation.
You can either stand on the sidelines and do some soul searching or open your eyes and confront the issue – the ‘beast’.

The ‘home truths’ you are looking for are staring at you in the face: you are infatuated with this guy and this is becoming a rather disturbing experience for you.

You say you cannot put him out of your mind; you have not met him and you feel this way; you don’t know if he feels this way towards you.

Your question as to what I would do is neither here nor there. I am not you and even if I did give a rhetoric of “I would do this or that” that is really not the issue here.
You ARE hurting now and in your situation I see two possibilities:
Just block him out – all of him from your life: his number, his contact details, do not answer his calls, and everything that is ‘DO NOT’ than Do.
Can you do that?

Do you want to confront the situation and see what it is made of? Then MEET him.

I will throw in a third option: if this situation, as you say, is causing you sleepless nights, why don’t you just go away somewhere for a week or two and CUT OFF all contact with him, for if you don’t cut him off, you might as well save your money and stay home and go through the sleeplessness…

In fact, I only see two options here; the third one was to help you cope with the first option.

What do you say?

N.B. the above was not a reading and it was purely my opinion which you asked for.  You are at full liberty to do what you feel and think is the right thing to do.

All the best to you Minnie.
I will send you some healing to make this situation bearable for you.

Hugs
Cedars
Last edited by cedars on Thu Jul 09, 2015 10:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Minnie6000
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Post by Minnie6000 » Thu Jul 09, 2015 7:38 pm

Hi Cedars

Thanks for your response. The reason I asked after the comment 'infatuation on one or both sides' , was because the engagement between us in intense. We speak 8-10 hours a day 3 days in a row, silence for 1 week and then re start. Therefore, seemingly strong connection. I know it probably sounds silly/intangible, given we have never met, but it is hard to explain, hence my query above. but I assume your answer was your felt it infatuation on my part exclusively.

Anyway, for the information of all those reading etc. I have decided that for my sanity, I will cut off contact. I'm not healthy enough to reach like normal , stable people, i.e. to try to be friends. I am very emotionally needy and also have too much time on my hands atm, owing to being inbetween jobs. Feels very uncomfortable to cut him off, when I like him so much and am intrigued to meet him, and as we have talked about meeting so much, but I have to make the 'sacrifice' you mentioned. No choice.

Thanks again anyway, for your time and everything to date.

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cedars
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Post by cedars » Fri Jul 10, 2015 3:33 pm

Dear Minnie,

It is really irrelevant on whose side is the infatuation, but as you are my prime object of concern, I can only refer to your side.

I wish you all the best in finding your own solution.

Dont make any 'sacrifice' that I or anyone else may have mentioned. Just follow your own instincts.

Best wishes to you and you can always come back and tell us how things turned out for you.

Blessings.

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