Tough Life/ No Love

[Brightwater]

Thanks.  An honest sit down with myself one says?  Well, I don't think I am really in denial, but am probably ignoring myself.  :>  

[suzisco]

i still think you are an amazing individual and i applaud your attitude.  There are many people out there that would crumble with a lesser life.

Large hugs and a big smile.


Suzi XXX

[CaraCat]

Have you ever thought about a marriage therapy, so that your marriage gets easier and you may be find out why your husband doesn't have interest in sex? Playing around is never a solution, it only brings negative energy in your relationship. One way or another you should work it out. Talk to your closest friends, that sometimes helps, too.

CaraCat

[lluvia]

BIG BIG HUGS DEAR LLUVIA

[justnara]

hugs, love and best wishes from me
x

[Cosmiceyes]

Talk about being between a rock and  a hard place!!!

Huge hugs!

There are no easy solutions for the many issues you are dealing with. And I am not qualified to address the benefits of your spiritual practice.

A suggestion does come to mind. At least for now, how about some private "toys" for self pleasure as opposed to finding a male surrogate for sex? You may find the resentment of having no sex life with your husband less irritating.

Does no sex also mean no affection and no intimacy of any kind between you and your husband? Is there any kind of meaningful foundation between you and your husband that you can build upon to create a better quality of life on a day to day basis since you have chosen to stay in the marriage for the reasons you have stated?

I agree with others that these are not your problems. With that being said, what can you do in little ways to change your own perceptions and impact the joy you feel inside of yourself?

You have limited options in your present circumstances. That does not mean that you have limited options, inside of yourself.

WIth love and prayers for your hapiness.

[tourbi]

Merry Meet
I feel for you!!

I want to address the no sex and being Pagan/Wiccan.
There are aspects of "sex".  There is intimacy.  Intimacy can be with dear friends, friends who are open to loving and caring deeply, without being sexual. Being able to share emotionally.
There is the act of sex.  That act is one of creation.  Coming together with energies and creating.  Creating life as an option in sex is wonderful.
Bringing the energies of the Lord into you and then be creative, draw, write,  come up with wonderful chants, write songs, wrote music, poems. paint, create flower beds to the Goddess and God. Redirect your creative powers.  Work with the Muses, call upon them to be with you and inspire you.

At time, when I want to be held and empowered being with a man, I sit and connect with Greenman.  If possible outside on the ground.  I sit and start talking with Greenman.  The first time and each time since.  I poured out my heart to him and asked for him to be there for me, to help me.  I became aware of an energy from deep within the earth rising towards me.  That energy felt like a plant growing.  
As I sat, I felt a plant grown around me.  I felt strong limbs of the plant encircling me, embracing me, supporting me.  I felt the leaves on my face, reassuring me.  
His energy supported me, embraced me, empowered me.  

Time for discussion, just thinking.  If our energy is the energy of the Universe, The Gods/esses, then the energy that comes thru our partner as we share intimately, it also comes from the Universe.  
Call upon those energies.  Bring them into your life.  
Ask the Gods/Goddesses to bring to you what you desire.  
Be open to receive.

I know none of this replaces what you long to have.  I do know Pagan women who use the energy of Beltaine to empower their creative endeavors.  It provides them a great deal of satisfaction.  They redirect their sexual energy to fulfill their creative side and are incredibly empowered in what they do.
Some are good teachers in the community, others give to the community their time and creativity.
Part of sex is the giving. Find good place to give, where people will genuinely appreciate what you are giving.
Part of sex is receiving.  Give to yourself, receive from the Gods/Goddesses, receive from the Universe.  

Be open to what  is given to you, be open to your creative voice/hand, be open to new ideas.  All acts of love and pleasure.  Do what you love!!

My heart goes out to you.  
You deserve the best!!

[dhav]

Cool saying Tourbi.I agree.

[Molissa]

beautifully said, tourbi.
Brightwater, sending you a hug and vibes for finding some release and peace of mind.

[ladybloodmoon]

well frist heres a great big hug hope things are starting to turn around for you i can't offer any advice myself but what others have said here is good advice and i agree with cosmiceyes toys could be really helpful in the fact that you wouldn't feel as resentful about not having sex and fantisys are sometimes better then the real thing sending positve energy out to you and hope things are looking up for you if they haven't already and i hope that i'm as strong a person when i'm older and if you feel you need to talk to someone look me up on here i'm always willing to listen and some times thats all you need lots of love