Father

[Crow]

Again today I search
Leaving me crumbs
I did see
All that you left for me

I located info
Some good and some bad
Seems that you are sick
Is it really that bad

The love you give her
Not of our blood
Is she more important
Is she more loved

From a distance I kept watching
Awaiting your replie

Although I have studied
I am below
Another disappointment
Your afraid to show

I had only wished to share
A moment of your time
To know my father
The way that she knows mine

I am a bit jealous
This I will say
I tried so hard
You threw it away

I your first born
Such a disappointment
Your sons and her child
You all have welcomed

Close your eyes
But you will see
The little girl you left
You'll never be free

Your actions, the lessons
So much have I grown
I am but your child
Please remember me

[prasanna]

WOW!  Beautiful poem dear, thanks for sharing this with us .

[Danny]

[Crow]

Prasanna-thank you for your kind words.

Danny-As to the manure, lol. I like that little tid bit. Now that you put in that way, I should be nice and full of flavor.  Will have to remember that.  I'm gonna write that down and put it somewhere to remind me.  Nice words to share.  

As to the step-mom, wish I could say she was evil.  Wish I could hate her daughter whom my dad has taken under his wings.  But they are really nice to him and I see through his posts on his site that he is happy.  Having left as a child, I always tried reaching out.  This was something I just had to except, to respect his wishes.  Now he is sick and I know more than I wish.  Not having the closer will hurt the most I think.  There is always hope and that is what I have to keep believing.  Until he draws his last breathe, I will be there...ready to recieve with arms wide open.  It might not happen.  I'll just cross that bridge when I get there.  My father's lesson for me was that I could not make anyone love me. Love is not guarenteed.  No matter how hard I tried to make him proud to want me to be in his life, I would not measure up.  Like you mentioned, some people want them to be what they are not.  I learned I was doing this for the wrong reason, I needed to do it for me.  I also needed to learn to respect other people's wishes, even if I didn't agree.  Out of love I do not cause strive in his life.  Although I have my moments where I want to cause some mischief!!  But would this really make me feel better?  Would I have my father in my life?  More than likely I would just push him away further.  So I watch from a distance, and wait.  Even in this, I see the poo that makes my soil rich.  Never heard it put that way before until today, but I like it!! Thank you again for sharing.

Safe Journey

[Rohiniranjan]

OLD poem but hopefully some of you will enjoy! It was written for a weary and troubled -- and yet very peaceful in some ways -- soul that I met in my long journey. A product of a divorce beyond her control. I never got close enough to ask if she blamed herself for the divorce. I would easily have done so -- today...:
**********************************
SOME   FATHER'S   DAY  

Sitting in my swing watching butterflies flitter
as a cloud rolls by shedding its lonely tear
as winds blow by and rock me gently
as hazy memories on this day become so clear

Those strong sinewy hands that touched me never
those rough hard fingers that I longed to touch
that I wished held me as they dressed my scrapes
a pat on the head that said I love you dear

That hardened face with its lines and shadows
that hugged me goodnight and tucked me and my bear
the knee I sat on that felt so strong
the familiar voice reading 'my' bedtime story

That booming voice that raised me with love
that gentleness that was only mine
behind the shell of strength of his exterior
As I hugged him tight and he loved me back

That proud face on my graduation day
the tear-filled happy eyes giving me away
the loneliness that I, just left behind...
cherished memories that I could have shared

Love I've had by bushels and bushels
as I took what was there and gave myself!
On this day though I wish I had
the dream of my life, my darling dad.

**************June 1993*************

Those were 'simpler' times believe me in NET-REALITY!!

Rohiniranjan

[prasanna]

Dear Ranjanda,


                     Your beautiful poem on "FATHER"  brought me  back into the memories  of my childhood days and the whole years which I spent with my lovely dad, Prasanna.
Sitting (alone)  in my reading table in front of my laptop,  really reading your words, I shed tears in memory of my lovely dad, whom we lost on 11 th  August 1995 at his early age of 57. There is neither a  gentle wind ( inside my room) nor a smooth finger  to wipe out my tears dear dada.. .. Thanks for sharing this . Please do share all your lovely poems daily here.   I have not yet dare to write poem on father. , cause ,  whenever I think of father or the word  "dad " brings me into tears only , which I am unable  to control for few hours.


Regards,

[Rohiniranjan]

...I have not yet dare to write poem on father. , cause ,  whenever I think of father or the word  "dad " brings me into tears only , which I am unable  to control for few hours. ...,

Interesting, Prasanna!
Have you ever tried poetry as a means to heal yourself, and then others if you are fortunate?

[prasanna]

Dear Ranjanda,


               I am not sure about , my poetic talents that  can heal others or not.  I have not yet  tried to notice that I can say. But I got healing many times browsing through poetries , like Tirukkural, Bharathiyar"s poetries.etc .(listening to Bharathiyar's kavithaigal,  in the the voice of my favorite singer , Sri Unni krishnan,  I used to forget the world around me, many times.) I start writing poems when I become sad too. Mostly I used to write love poems, Separation poems etc

.As such I can admit your views , I got healing myself ,many times through poetries either by writing  my own or  reading other poets.   In my opinion, poets live in Illusions . Poets  are  magicians and I love that magical touch ever, which heals sorrowful hearts. My vote goes to pathetic type of poems ever. So I love Hindi Gazals and Tamil philosophical old songs. (Dard bhari aawaz mujhe sureeli lagthi hai)

                    Dear Dada ,wish me,  I should grow as a big poet who can heal others,  through her poetries in future. Please share your favorite poets and poetries  in HINDI . Have u ever read poetess "   Chowhanji ki Batchpan? " or " ko e hu e batchpan ke yadhen" I am trying to get it . Because of u , I am going back to my school days memories , I can say .Thanks dada.  Do share more.


Regards,

[Rohiniranjan]

Dear Ranjanda,


               I am not sure about , my poetic talents that  can heal others or not.  I have not yet  tried to notice that I can say. But I got healing many times browsing through poetries , like Tirukkural, Bharathiyar"s poetries.etc .(listening to Bharathiyar's kavithaigal,  in the the voice of my favorite singer , Sri Unni krishnan,  I used to forget the world around me, many times.) I start writing poems when I become sad too. Mostly I used to write love poems, Separation poems etc

.As such I can admit your views , I got healing myself ,many times through poetries either by writing  my own or  reading other poets.   In my opinion, poets live in Illusions . Poets  are  magicians and I love that magical touch ever, which heals sorrowful hearts. My vote goes to pathetic type of poems ever. So I love Hindi Gazals and Tamil philosophical old songs. (Dard bhari aawaz mujhe sureeli lagthi hai)

                    Dear Dada ,wish me,  I should grow as a big poet who can heal others,  through her poetries in future. Please share your favorite poets and poetries  in HINDI . Have u ever read poetess "   Chowhanji ki Batchpan? " or " ko e hu e batchpan ke yadhen" I am trying to get it . Because of u , I am going back to my school days memories , I can say .Thanks dada.  Do share more.


Regards,

Prasanna,

I love classical music. Before I moved to North America I had heard a few names of classical composers but after I moved to N.A. I had an opportunity to hear their work and acquire a few recordings. My dada always wondered how I managed to pick the best of the recordings without knowing anything about music or their work (he was the intellectual amongst my siblings )

Even to this day, some decades later, I have never been able to motivate myself to study and learn and remember the work of composers or specifics, such as this is "III-Scherzo" from Peter Ilytch's Fourth symphony or K.525 composition by Mozart!

This left brain inability has in no way reduced my ability to really enjoy at a deep soul level the heavenly music! In fact I use classical music as a sound mask when I am doing astrological readings

Likewise, I have never worried too much about whose poem and when written or so on! Useful information for a librarian or wants to possess it but not one who just wants to enjoy the music or poetry even if it is the last time he is listening to it. There is no FINAL LOSS if you catch my drift, dear Kanya...!

Written on 19 November 1993 a special day for me:

RECIPE OF FRIENDSHIP
================

A huge big pot of welcome
two ladles full of love
 one tablespoon of caring
  and one likewise of sharing.

A pinch or two of 'spice'
 two lumps of real happiness
   few drops of empathy;
     oodles of overflowing honesty.

Then stir into it well
the batter sweet and soft,
 with a hint or two of genuine concern.

Heat this mixture then lovingly
with true warmth straight from the heart
 keep it stirring, never letting it settle.
Never taking it for granted;

lest some of it gets claimed
 and consumed by the fire
  of passion, that burns threateningly close.

Keep spooning off the scum
of pride and frothing bitterness,
 of jealousy and vanity,
  mistrust and pettiness.

The potion of passion volatile
so easy to conjure,
 eyes, some heart, lot of lust
  yearning and some daring

Friendship though is so different
no wonder it's hard at first
those hours and hours of selfless caring
 and sharing with someone you truly love.

Trials and tribulations of karma hurt indeed
Once, though, the pot is cooked and ready,
 O' friend O' beloved, we're then set
  for eons and eons of lasting eternity
*********************************************

[prasanna]

Dear Ranjan annAji,


               Thanks a lot for sharing this beautiful recipe of friendship.  To me I ever say, friendship is the only ship, which never sinks. It is truly eternal.

             
Friendship though is so different
no wonder it's hard at first
those hours and hours of selfless caring
and sharing with someone you truly love.
 

                In your poem I can quote these lines  as Golden lines.      My dear sister , Nandini is so kind , she has given me, links of your poetries, which  i am going through one by one now.  But I am so selfish,  I dont want to give that link here. I wish My dada should post all his poems  here,  so that every one should have the pleasure of reading them (with the efforts of your own , in sharing ) .  Repeating them again, i dont feel u are wasting your energy, in fact U could enjoy the golden memories of  the days , U  wrote them. My heartiest congrats to U , dada , for winning many awards.   Thanks for fulfilling my request now.

      Last but not the least, I can say, I have very powerful left brain, which could memorize the names of all lovely poets and singers and their works too. I am used to enjoy music  recollecting the facial  expressions of artists  ever. I like more live concerts of classical singers.  I think , this Mesha kanya's Budh is very powerful.  Rite?


Regards,

[Crow]

Rohiniranjan,

Thank you for sharing those beautiful poems.  I look forward to more poetry that you might have to share.

Safe Journey

[Rohiniranjan]

Dear Ranjan annAji,


               Thanks a lot for sharing this beautiful recipe of friendship.  To me I ever say, friendship is the only ship, which never sinks. It is truly eternal.

             
Friendship though is so different
no wonder it's hard at first
those hours and hours of selfless caring
and sharing with someone you truly love.
 

                In your poem I can quote these lines  as Golden lines.      My dear sister , Nandini is so kind , she has given me, links of your poetries, which  i am going through one by one now.  But I am so selfish,  I dont want to give that link here. I wish My dada should post all his poems  here,  so that every one should have the pleasure of reading them (with the efforts of your own , in sharing ) .  Repeating them again, i dont feel u are wasting your energy, in fact U could enjoy the golden memories of  the days , U  wrote them. My heartiest congrats to U , dada , for winning many awards.   Thanks for fulfilling my request now.

      Last but not the least, I can say, I have very powerful left brain, which could memorize the names of all lovely poets and singers and their works too. I am used to enjoy music  recollecting the facial  expressions of artists  ever. I like more live concerts of classical singers.  I think , this Mesha kanya's Budh is very powerful.  Rite?


Regards,

Let us just say I am too shy!

And it is not 'mesh' but what it is connected with and not just the tenant
But we do not want this poetry thread to get SCYTHED and transplanted into some hostile astrology nation! So let us go back to the soothing refrains of poetry:

Bazaar say gujraa hoon kharidaar nahin hoon!
<A mere window shopper, have no means to buy or possess what lives on the other side of the "glass wall" of the display window!>


This one you may not find on your friend's link:

ILLUSIONS

... depend on the Light
And how IT falls across -- just so...
On a *REAL* object!

The rope may seem like a snake in dim-light
But it would never bite or hurt...
But in the wrong light the motionless SNAKE may mimic a rope
SADLY, this one will kill – if you sit on it, too long!

Sometimes I wonder if that is the message of the curse of TIME
Which one the rope; which one the snake...?
And then the image of SHIVA: Noose around His BLUE neck!
The serpent – a protective symbol or warning?

An opportunity or incarceration, perhaps even a life sentence?
A wall to climb over or to beat your precious head against?
The object cannot change readily ... So the LIGHT must!


RR (2008-Jun-25 10:59 PM Eastern)

[prasanna]

Dear Ranjanda, &nbsp; &nbsp;

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; Being a versatile writer , how could u call yourself , u are shy? &nbsp; Sorry I cant accept this. I know this "Illusion" is new comer into your poetic treasure. Really fantastic it is!. On the other day , we all enjoyed &nbsp;this &nbsp;poetic &nbsp;" Amruth &nbsp;" in kethu moksha thread of vedic astrology forum. Thanks for sharing this here now. Still i feel, u could have posted this in separate thread, so that many might have tasted this Nector. &nbsp;

&nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp; &nbsp;Kavivar &nbsp;Ranjanji , App se prasanna ke choti see &nbsp;vinnathi, &nbsp; " App kab se appke Hindi kaviatha ki pravah me hame pravahith karayenge ji &nbsp;" Ham ko &nbsp;is ki entha zar hai, kae dino se . &nbsp; ( &nbsp;A humble small request from prasanna to &nbsp;poet, Ranjanji, &nbsp;" when are u going to post &nbsp;your Hindi poem?" &nbsp; I am waiting for this from long time.) sorry for my Hindi to English half translation now. This translation now, &nbsp;i tried for my dear friend crow , as I know her interest in learning our language. Dont say I wont write Hindi poems dear. I &nbsp;feel u can write very good Hindi poems. If u have not yet tried , please try for my sake. Your Hindi is simply superb. &nbsp;Thanks dada once again. Due to your motivation, I started writing Hindi poems now a days.


warm regards,

[Rohiniranjan]

Dear Ranjanda,    

                          Being a versatile writer , how could u call yourself , u are shy?   Sorry I cant accept this. I know this "Illusion" is new comer into your poetic treasure. Really fantastic it is!. On the other day , we all enjoyed  this  poetic  " Amruth  " in kethu moksha thread of vedic astrology forum. Thanks for sharing this here now. Still i feel, u could have posted this in separate thread, so that many might have tasted this Nector.  

               Kavivar  Ranjanji , App se prasanna ke choti see  vinnathi,   " App kab se appke Hindi kaviatha ki pravah me hame pravahith karayenge ji  " Ham ko  is ki entha zar hai, kae dino se .   (  A humble small request from prasanna to  poet, Ranjanji,  " when are u going to post  your Hindi poem?"   I am waiting for this from long time.) sorry for my Hindi to English half translation now. This translation now,  i tried for my dear friend crow , as I know her interest in learning our language. Dont say I wont write Hindi poems dear. I  feel u can write very good Hindi poems. If u have not yet tried , please try for my sake. Your Hindi is simply superb.  Thanks dada once again. Due to your motivation, I started writing Hindi poems now a days.


warm regards,

Poetry first came to me in Hindi. I have been writing in english only since 80s.

[Rohiniranjan]

Hindi poem deleted by Rohiniranjan because it caused grief to older members!