Marital Bonds

The dynamics of Childcare and relationships have changed & needs a closer look... Discuss Parenting & Family issues here.

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tw96754
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Location: Kerala, India

Marital Bonds

Post by tw96754 » Fri Oct 26, 2007 9:11 am

The tie of marrigage is the basis of family.  Weakenig of marital ties results in a weakening of family ties and disorganisation of family.

The basis of husband and wife relationship in the modern family should be built on cooperation.  The stablity of the family can be maintained only by benevolence,empathy,sympathyand cooperation.  It is not easy to create these qualities.  It needs strong will and dedication.


Good Luck


Alummoottil
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zeamone
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Post by zeamone » Fri Oct 26, 2007 11:37 am

But still in our times, male preferred to be the dominant in the house also also women starts to lead the family too that's why there are always conflict as to who will lead the house.
Did I miss something?

ekjbhat
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Marital bonds

Post by ekjbhat » Thu Dec 06, 2007 5:07 am

Only give and take attitude will save the families.In india You can see many combained families having more than 50 members which will possible only with gove & take attitude.Though now a days such families are decresing due to the influence of western culture by properly bringing the childrens we can attain it.
                                                                                                   With regards
                                                                                                       ekjbhat(Makara)

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Rhutobello
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Post by Rhutobello » Thu Dec 06, 2007 8:36 am

zeamone wrote:But still in our times, male preferred to be the dominant in the house also also women starts to lead the family too that's why there are always conflict as to who will lead the house.
The best way to create a lasting marriage is to build it on "love and respect" for each other, as said....a give and take situation.

It must not be that 1 part automatic shall do what tradition tells...this will only lead to frustration.

We humans are all different...some are better in "controlling" other is better in caring. This don't always follow the sexes, and if a woman is better suited to be the dominant person in the family...the whole family will benefit from it....if she rule with "love and respect"

On the other hand, if both parts is of dominant type, the family will "suffer" or the weakest of them have to so...or if "smart" control the other part true  "manipulation" (not in bad meaning)  :)

But it seems the "forgiving" and "caring"part have been "lost" somewhere in the Western way of life....we are now up in around 50% divorce and most have started to live in partnership....so man might say that not all progress have the same value.

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Gem
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Post by Gem » Thu Dec 06, 2007 12:52 pm

From one woman's point of view, let me add this. If a man is the one that is expected to go out to work all day and earn a living with the woman staying at home then things will always have to a combination. A woman in charge all day, dealing with crisis, knocks on the door, the shopping and maintenance? but then has to give that authority over to the man just because they walk through the door? Perhaps bring them their slippers and a drink and have dinner ready in a clean and tidy home?   Working the house is 50 times harder than working outside the house.

Deborah
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Post by Deborah » Sat Dec 08, 2007 9:50 pm

Wow this message sounds rather sexist!  I have old fashion values but who is to say who is control ..do nether need the control .. can they not talk things openly and agree!

Trust

Communication

Respect

Oneness

Honesty

and last but not least LOVE

Ya put them together and you have some solid stone work!

Mandimedea
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Post by Mandimedea » Tue Feb 17, 2009 5:14 pm

I believe you need to support, communicate, compromise, educate, some sacrifice, and love unconditionally.

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kgirlsmomma
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Post by kgirlsmomma » Sat Mar 14, 2009 9:56 pm

Well, from one whose marriage 'failed', (I prefer to think of it as a life change) it was because we were not on 'the same page'.  Whatever you do, make it 'on the same page'.  From child discipline, to how many hours the spouse should work outside of the home, to extra cirricular activities,  time spent on building and maintaining 'traditions', division of household chores, money, 'outside' family members like parents & siblings, and on and on and on.....  Don't take anything for granted, especially whether or not the other one 'understands', what's going on.  Often, there are 2 completely different interpretations.

firetopaz
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Post by firetopaz » Mon Mar 16, 2009 11:08 pm

I am happily married, but it wasn't easy to get here.  Lot's of "disagreements", but we worked together to find solutions we could all be happy with.  I would prefer to stay home and raise my children, but financially it is not possible.  I like to think that we are past the point of disagreeing, but every now and again something comes up.  I couldn't say who is in charge...we both have strengths and weaknesses...and work together for the benifit of our household and children.  I cook cuz I like to eat edible food, he does the floors cuz i always miss parts of it...he organizes...I clean...etc.  If something is important to me...it is to him...and visa-versa, but I have to tell him that it's important...not wait for him to guess.  We both care about each other and try to make each other happy...goes a long way.

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kgirlsmomma
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Post by kgirlsmomma » Tue Mar 17, 2009 2:29 am

Caring about each other is wonderful..but as no one can make you feel mad, sad, glad, jealous..no one can make you happy...it is up to you..and you alone to find that happiness from within.

soulsearch
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Post by soulsearch » Tue Mar 17, 2009 3:27 am

I believe that marriage is about two individuals who know each other well and really understand that there is actually no need for the other to change...because that is the main reason for loving the person.To love the person as a whole.

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