My Daughter Consulted With Me About Her Research

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blankpuppy
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My Daughter Consulted With Me About Her Research

Post by blankpuppy » Tue Oct 06, 2015 2:32 am

Hi, my daughter is currently focusing on her study about personality and career development. I think, it's a real problem because she's kinda affected and stressed already. She is asking my help and so I made some research online and found information related to her topic. I even gave her a book about different personality style. However, she said that she needs more references related to career goals development tools. Can you suggest or recommend relevant learning solutions about such topic. I found a few online but I'm not sure if they will cost a lot for a research. It might be intended only for companies. Are you guys familiar with it?

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eye_of_tiger
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Post by eye_of_tiger » Tue Oct 06, 2015 5:35 am

I know that you want to help your daughter, but I feel that it would be more valuable to her education and self confidence to have to find these references for herself.

How old is she, and what course is she doing which requires these references?

As a father of two adult chidren and a retired school teacher myself, I want to make you aware that you are with the best of intentions putting yourself in a no win situation.

You will never be able to find enough of the references which she is asking for as she is highly stressed out, and she has totally unrealistic expectations about you finding exactly what she is looking for which simply does not exist.

As parents we need to know when we should step in to help our offspring, and when they need to learn to do things for themselves.

Getting the balance just right between them is often difficult for any loving parent, especially when they know how to push all our wrong emotional buttons at the same time.

Did she remember to thank you for the references which you already found for her?

EoT
Last edited by eye_of_tiger on Tue Oct 06, 2015 10:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Talia
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Re: My Daughter Consulted With Me About Her Research

Post by Talia » Tue Oct 06, 2015 12:43 pm

blankpuppy wrote:Hi, my daughter is currently focusing on her study about personality and career development. I think, it's a real problem because she's kinda affected and stressed already. She is asking my help and so I made some research online and found information related to her topic. I even gave her a book about different personality style. However, she said that she needs more references related to career goals development tools. Can you suggest or recommend relevant learning solutions about such topic. I found a few online but I'm not sure if they will cost a lot for a research. It might be intended only for companies. Are you guys familiar with it?
That is a heavy topic for a child so young, are you sure what she is studying? At her age she should be doing much more basic research adn nt getting her mother to help her, have you spoken to her teacher?

Calla Abegail
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Post by Calla Abegail » Mon Oct 12, 2015 1:54 pm

I don't think that something that you can find online could be the most helpful.I'm gonna say that communication is still the most important thing.

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eye_of_tiger
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Post by eye_of_tiger » Tue Oct 13, 2015 11:04 pm

One point that I was trying to make here is that your daughter finding the information by herself online is part of how her teacher is assessing her work, and marking her project upon.

If you do it for her even with the best of intentions,  then you are effectively telling her that she cannot do these things for herself and that she must therefore always depend upon other people to do it for her.

But having said the above I repeat that I am very aware of how our children (even as adults) know how to push all our guilt buttons at the same time, in order to get us to do for them what they should be learning to do for themselves.

Parents unite!

EoT  :smt002  :smt002

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