A love reading request

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dhav
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A love reading request

Post by dhav » Tue Jan 21, 2020 2:52 pm

Dear Brian,

It's almost the end of Jan 2020. I have been healing a lot and giving self love and It is not yet over. Many issues are coming out and sometimes it goes for weeks until I get clarity. But there is one which is bugging me on and on. I have feelings for a friend who is much younger than I. We were working together and had great chemistry but there was always interference of others in our relationship. He has also hurt me as consequences and I had a great big anger towards him which created conflicts inside me between and anger and love towards him. He has also recently gone into a relationship with a former fiend (someone who is manipulative and caused harm to me) and I decided to back off as it was too hurting for me. The problem is I feel a deep connection with him and I find it so difficult to let go. He does not want me to go away and remain his friends as we are always clear about each other and can talk freely to each other. It is like my love life is stuck like this. Each time I again interact with him after supposed clearing all my feelings I end up having feelings and hope for him despite him having a gf. I just find myself suffering again. I would like a clarity about this relationship and my love life if possible.

p.s Maybe I could make a movie out of this. :smt017
OnLy*I*LoVe*U~~I am a sweet Lovely Girl

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Re: A love reading request

Post by eye_of_tiger » Wed Jan 22, 2020 1:09 am

dhav wrote:
Tue Jan 21, 2020 2:52 pm
Dear Brian,

It's almost the end of Jan 2020. I have been healing a lot and giving self love and It is not yet over. Many issues are coming out and sometimes it goes for weeks until I get clarity. But there is one which is bugging me on and on. I have feelings for a friend who is much younger than I. We were working together and had great chemistry but there was always interference of others in our relationship. He has also hurt me as consequences and I had a great big anger towards him which created conflicts inside me between and anger and love towards him. He has also recently gone into a relationship with a former fiend (someone who is manipulative and caused harm to me) and I decided to back off as it was too hurting for me. The problem is I feel a deep connection with him and I find it so difficult to let go. He does not want me to go away and remain his friends as we are always clear about each other and can talk freely to each other. It is like my love life is stuck like this. Each time I again interact with him after supposed clearing all my feelings I end up having feelings and hope for him despite him having a gf. I just find myself suffering again. I would like a clarity about this relationship and my love life if possible.

p.s Maybe I could make a movie out of this. :smt017
Dear Dhav,

Perhaps an appropriate title for the movie about this relationship would be "Fatal Attraction" although you could encounter some serious copyright issues if you were to use it, as the name has already been taken.

There is definitely a strong connection between you, your former work colleague as well as his current partner, but it is above all an intensely unhealthy one of codependency instead of being based upon love and mutual respect.

This man wants to have his metaphoric cake and eat it too. He is so deeply insecure and has such a fragile male ego, that he says that he wants the both of you in his life. With you as a "friend" (thereby not having to make any long term emotional commitment towards you), and a woman who has manipulated and hurt you in the past as his lover.

Talk about him wanting to wipe your face in the dirt and showing a complete lack of respect for your feelings, by effectively demoting you to an observer.

What sort of of" friend" keeps you trapped by treating you like a human doormat for him to wipe his muddy feet on, and not being man enough to decide between the two of you ladies, once and for all?

The friend (you) - narcissist (him) - girlfriend (you) triangle will not and can never work.

I can also well imagine what great pleasure and sense of revenge the other woman will get by watching him treat you like a cat does a mouse, before the final kill (breaking your heart).

If you permit this situation to continue, it will ultimately destroy what significant progress you have made in so many other areas of your life, up until now.

There is no way that I can see of this total distortion of a normal, healthy human relationship NOT ending badly, for all three of you.

It is critical to you developing self esteem and self respect and increased resilience to break this connection, both energetically (see below) as well as by you not initiating any further contact with either of these two FIENDS, a spelling error on your part which gives a much truer picture of how much damage these two could potentially cause to your ongoing self healing efforts.

Breaking the energy connection which is holding you to him and stopping you from moving forwards with the self healing process involves something called DECORDING.

That is you are going to have to learn to visualise in your mind's eye permanently breaking (pulling not cutting) the energy cords which bind you to him.

I realise that you still have mixed feelings for him, and that as a consequence you may decide not to go ahead with this after all.

That is always your decision to make, and while I hope that you will make the choice which will lead to your emotional freedom from this codependency nightmare, I will respect your right to do so.

The following web page gives you a brief description of what I am talking about, plus more importantly a decording script which you can record with you reading it out loud, then play it back to assist you during the actual visualisation session.

https://www.processcoaching.com/decording

Please keep me updated (either in this thread, or if you would prefer through a private message) about any progress which you feel that you are making using this method, or any further problems or questions which you might have, DIRECTLY RELATED TO the decording, or to the contents of this reading.

All the very best of love, light and healing on your personal journey towards attaining greater WHOLENESS, which is at the core of all self healing.

You deserve to be treated much better and much more kindly and respectfully, than this man is capable of giving to any woman. IMHO

Loving regards,

Brian :smt049 :smt049

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dhav
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Re: A love reading request

Post by dhav » Wed Jan 22, 2020 7:57 am

Thank You Brian.

Yes it just clarify myself as I am drowned in my emotions and it's much better someone else gives me his clarity.
Yes it's no coincidence that I add fiend instead of friend. She has used me to get info how to get through to him while knowing I had feelings for him. And she acts as if she understand both our deep relationship. As for him he is a a fool who gets easily manipulated as he has obviously has no direction about his life. He has been used by many people but did not respect me as should be. Him being with that girl now is like karma getting at him till he understand things. He has been feeling torn between us both as I have stopped being friend with that girl and he cannot meet with as frequently as we used to.
Yesterday dreamed I went to a room he kept aside his side. At first I was cleaning it as he asked me to but then later I came back and burned it down. Later I dreamed i was in a car in the backseat with him driving and the girl at the other front seat. He was going to leave me home then he decided otherwise and decided to go to a place we used togo. he was constantly looking at me deciding what todo.
I told him everything what I feel about the other girl and having no respect for etc. I am working on cutting this chord as this will get me nowhere. I will go through the process of dechording. I wish for a partner who would protect me, respect me and love me as should be and as well be a good friend to me. He as a friend either never did respect me. :smt006

Will get back to you. :smt035 :smt034

Dhav.

p.s Hope you are good there. Yes we can communicate with the progress through private message.
OnLy*I*LoVe*U~~I am a sweet Lovely Girl

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Re: A love reading request

Post by eye_of_tiger » Wed Jan 22, 2020 10:28 am

Dear Dhav,

Thanking you in return for your honest and thoughtful feedback.

Even your dreams confirm that he is a loser, and that your fiend still has valuable lessons to learn about the price which she must pay for betraying you, on more than one occasion.

During the reading I was getting a definite impression that their dysfunctional relationship was a form of karmic retribution for what harm they have done to your ability to trust anyone in the future.

I also felt that this is not the first lifetime where all three of you have been in a similar relationship triangle to this one, although in previous lives each of you has taken on a different role.

It is as though you are each taking turns through many incarnations, in order to directly experience the consequences of your actions, but from the perspective of the other two participants.
I wish for a partner who would protect me, respect me and love me as should be and as well be a good friend to me.
I also pray that you will eventually find such a person, as you deserve to.

Just remember that men are also imperfect human beings like women, and therefore finding a man who does all of these things equally well is going to be a big ask.

If you will not settle for anything less than the highly unrealistic, over romanticised picture of what "your only soulmate in all the world" should be like, you could well be setting yourself up for a lonely life in your old age.

While many couples are fortunate enough to find their lover and best friend in the same person, do not depend upon it happening in your case.

If it happens, that would be wonderful.

Take good care of yourself,

Brian :smt056

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